This is the confidence that we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. -1 John 5:14
If I’ve learned anything over this last year, it’s that God honors bold prayers and bold obedience. He truly desires to hear our hearts and our requests and He WILL show up in some of the most unexpected ways. I’ve sat in awe in the ways that I’ve seen Him show up in my fundraising efforts, in words that I’ve received and given, in equipping me and my teams in ministry, and in multiple events that could only be the work of the Spirit. I’ve experienced it. I’ve read about the countless ways the Lord responded to big and bold prayers in the Bible. I’ve encountered people and their stories time and time again that display the willingness, desire, and personal ways that the Lord wants to honor requests prayed in true belief and dependence on Him.
Why then, do I still question how realistic my prayers or goals are when I go to actually put them in writing or speak them out? Why do I question if it’s something the Lord actually wants to hear and to honor? If I trust the Lord, why do I put limits on what I think He can do and the time that He can do it in?
In my time squad leading, the Lord has continually challenged me in trusting Him. In praying big prayers and walking in His authority. In fully relying on Him in my needs and in guiding my leadership. In laying out my dreams believing that He truly wants to hear the desires of my heart and that He wants to honor them. That I don’t need to fear actually speaking them out or writing them down in fear of the ‘what ifs.” That even though the prayers that I pray may take time to be answered or may not be answered in the way that I think, that He CAN and He WANTS to hear them and to answer them.
This last month, the Lord has laughed at me as I learn this lesson at an even deeper level and actually walk it out.
During our month in Ghana, our squad mentor had a meeting with all of us who were still fundraising. She challenged us to pray about 5 people to reach out to and invite to partner with us in what the Lord has called us to do with a specific request. I cringed as she said it. The Lord worked in incredible ways while I was home in regards to my fundraising, but I had been sitting at needing about $1600 since December and it seemed to not really be going anywhere. I knew that I needed to write letters and actually invite people in- but that’s so hard for me to do. I prayed and made myself sit down and write the letters. The Lord highlighted people that I needed to share my journey with and how He wanted me to ask them to partner with me. My mentor took the letters back to the States and mailed them for us. In that step of obedience on my part, as uncomfortable as it was, the Lord used a few of those people to affirm and encourage me. They responded with eagerness and gratefulness to partner with me. They sent letters of encouragement and helped me get closer to my goal.
This month in Cambodia, I’ve been circling the last $900 I needed in prayer. When I went to actually write a specific prayer to circle in my journal, I originally put the date June 1 as a goal. The Lord challenged me that that was too far, that it wasn’t a prayer of trust. So I instead put down the date May 1. I prayed over it this entire month. So on Friday, I broke down my needs in the form of the shape of Thailand and went to Facebook to invite people to help me with the last $650 needed to be fully funded.
I told you all on that post that my goal was to be fully funded by the end of Thailand. What I didn’t say was, that at the beginning of this month when putting a date down, I really wanted to put down and pray for all funds to be in before I left for Thailand. Instead, I put down the end. You see, that goal was safer. It was more realistic in my mind. It had cushion and room if no one responded right away. I knew that I was going to make the post this week and thought that it’d be crazy to expect the money to come in in just a few short days. In all honesty, the prayer I was praying was out of fear that the Lord just might not show up.
But God. Those two words change so many stories- both in history and our day to day lives. I made my post on Friday and by the time I went to bed Saturday night, I had received commitments for all $650 needed. That means, that once all of my monthly commitments for April come through, I will be officially FULLY FUNDED. What I was hoping and praying for the Lord to do in a month, He did in less than TWO days. YOU all were answers to those prayers with your generous giving.
The Lord showed up with all of His grace and love, despite the fact that my prayers lacked boldness. He blessed the obedience of my asking and stepping out, even when there’s room for me to grow in that area. He showed up and used it to remind me that He has no limits. That He wants to give us good gifts. That He listens and He hears. That He doesn’t call us to something to not equip or provide. Lessons that I am so grateful for in this season of leadership and fundraising. Lessons that are affirming and comforting as I pray and look forward to the future and what that holds- knowing I can trust the Lord.
In this instance, I didn’t pray the big prayer that I felt called to pray. But I started somewhere, and that’s a start. I want my life to be lived out of abundant expectance of the Lord to move. Of reliance on Him and as a testimony of the Lord showing up. But in order for that to happen, I need to pray the big and bold prayers. I need to allow myself to walk in obedience into situations where He HAS to show up for it to work out. To remember that it’s not my job to figure out how the prayer is going to be answered or how it’s possible, it’s just my job to pray it and to believe that the Lord will work. To walk in obedience and faith and to remember that even if it doesn’t work out the way I expect or think, the big prayers glorify the Lord and impact the Kingdom.
In that, I’m challenging myself to put the pen to paper and pray and dream with the Lord. To not question or put limits on my prayers and I want to challenge you to do the same. What are the big prayers the Lord is calling you to pray? Do you believe that He hears you and that He wants to answer? How can you move forward in even the smallest of ways in trusting the Lord with your big prayers? I’d encourage you to write them out today and start circling them in prayer- for as long as that takes.
THANK YOU to all of you! The ways that you’ve generously sacrificed to partner with me in this journey and all of the encouraging words have meant the world to me. I could not be here today doing what the Lord has called me to without all of you, so thank you!
