Yes, I have a wedding board on Pinterest (it’s a millennial girl thing, okay?). Don’t judge.
As humans, we yearn for love. To be loved, to be known, and to be cared for. I struggle with idolizing marriage and relationships. It’s so easy for me to think that when I get a boyfriend, or a fiance, or husband, that THEN my life will be fulfilling. Then I’ll have everything I need.
I’m a sucker for a good romance movie. I love watching people fall in love. Yeah, yeah, typical… I know. But one time my (insanely wise) mom and I were watching one, and she said something that’s stuck with me ever since.
I was talking about how I can’t wait to fall in love, get married, etc. etc. But my mom said that romance movies are nothing like marriage. She talked about the fact that yes, marriage is great, but it’s not all that Hollywood has cooked it up to be. Marriage isn’t always filled heart-eyes and isn’t always lovey-dovey. It’s challenging, it’s transformative, and it’s filled with a lot of ups and downs. And it’s not the be-all-end-all. Yes, it’s great. But it’s not going to fulfill you.
All of the Pinterest-perfect pictures that people (including myself) scroll through every day are setting us up for failure. Marriage isn’t pinterest-perfect; It takes a lot of commitment, and isn’t always pretty. And, as I said before, it’s not fulfilling in and of itself.
On the flip side, maybe you’re the girl who doesn’t think that she’s worth a Pinterest relationship. Guess what, you’re not. You’re worth WAY more than that. YOU are worth more than cute pictures and candids that aren’t really candids. You are worth more than just a pretty ring and a white dress. You are priceless. You are worth a man who will love you unconditionally, stand by your side, and stay faithful to you. YOU DON’T BELIEVE ME, HUH?? Well, I’m always right…. Nah, I kid. But really, you are worth more than just a Pinterest wedding board.
So this is my question: Am I, are people, looking for a real relationships, or a Pinterest partner? I’m not saying that it’s a “sin” to take awesome pictures of a wedding, engagement, etc. I love photography and would probably cry if people stopped posting gorgeous pictures. What I am saying is that, although some people would like to have Pinterest-perfect relationships, it’s just not reality.
Don’t yearn for other people’s relationships just because they post cute pictures. Stop yearning for you and your boyfriend/fiancee/husband to be #relationshipgoals. Stop thinking that relationships are easy-peasey. Rather, expose yourself to the reality of what REAL marriage is. From what I understand, marriage is hard, refining, humbling, and really frustrating at times. BUT it’s also a great example of the redeeming love of Jesus; it can be used for His glory, not just for Pinterest.
There’s a hole in everyone’s heart that cannot be filled with a relationship or marriage. Yeah, yeah, I know. Typical illustration about a “jesus-sized-hole.” So much for being original. Anyways, as human beings, we all yearn to love and be loved. To be fully known and pursued. I desire that… I want that. But what I failed to realize is that no Hollywood or Pinterest romance can do that. Only the Lord… Let me repeat that. Only the LORD can fill you. He fully knows you, yet fully loves you. He pursues, and He chases, and He goes out of His way to show us grand gestures of His relentless love. He is bigger and better than any earthly relationship, and yes, even a Pinterest board. Don’t put your faith into a relationship that will only let you down. Put your effort, your heart, your desires, into the only One who can fully satisfy.
To all my Pinterest lovers, I’m not saying that you need to go delete your wedding board. It’s totally okay to be excited for that stage of your life. But don’t allow it to make you discontent about here and now. Live in the present. If you’re single, ENJOY IT. That’s what I’ve been doing (trying to do), and I would absolutely love it if you joined me. Focus on loving people well, pouring into friendships, and CHASING, without any distractions, after the Lord. He is preparing you NOW for what you will experience in the FUTURE. Don’t wish away the stage of life you’re in right now. Stop thinking that, “If ONLY I had….. (a boyfriend, a husband, a diamond ring, etc), THEN I would be fulfilled. THEN my life would be perfect.” Nope. It won’t. Be filled with Him, pursue HIM, allow HIM to woo you and show you what a relationship should look like. Let him write your story.
It’ll look way better than your Pinterest wedding board.
-Lyss
