self–suf·fi·cient
adjective -‘fi-sh?nt
: able to live or function without help or support from others; also known as Allison Hultquist
You may chuckle, but this is true and I’ve been seeing glimpses of this fact for the past couple of weeks. Now stick with me for a little back story. I ran the Detroit Marathon on October 19th, the day after training camp for the World Race. If you’ve ever gone through training camp, or have heard stories, it is probably the worst possible marathon prep you could imagine. For example:
- Eating different types and amounts of food – noodles for breakfast?
- Sleeping in bizarre and often uncomfortable places, temperatures, and noise levels – sharing a mummy sleeping bag with a teammate you just met, thanks again Bri 😉
- Being pushed emotionally, spiritually, and physically – ever step in a fire ant hill while wearing chacos THREE SEPEARTE TIMES?
That whole week I pushed into the truth that God has called me on the World Race and that He would be faithful and trustworthy to providing for me. AND THIS WAS SO TRUE. I was never hungry, I slept like a baby every night, and I experienced God’s love and grace in depths I had only imaged.
And then it was race day. And I felt great, up until mile 22 of 26.2 at which I experienced a pain similar to an Alaskan ice fisher jabbing his ice pick into my knee–pleasant right? But I finished and it was glorious, even though I couldn’t walk to the car and curled up in a ball in my space blanket in some wood chips, but I digress.
Fast forward 8 weeks later I STILL COULDN’T RUN. Naturally, I got frustrated. I had done all the right things. I had rested (kinda), I had gotten a cortisone shot, I had become a patient at the PT clinic I work at, and I had tried to pull strings to get an MRI.
Then, I got denied to get an MRI. And the doctor said to call the insurance company. And the insurance company couldn’t tell me why because they source out. And the company that they use doesn’t talk to patients. And then I tried to run and I could only manage 3/4 of a mile. In that moment my world seemed to collapse a little with the realization that I couldn’t do anything else. I couldn’t fix it.
So I did what any normal girl would do, I called my best friend and cried. 😉 And God started to do something beautiful. He let me be sad, he let me be frustrated, and He also put an awesome friend in my life to gently remind me that His heart is to provide and that He understands.
I got home from the gym and I pulled up my facebook and The World Race has just posted this blog: God Still Heals Today – And He healed my knee. Alright God, I see what you did there…. In that moment, I made a decision in my heart to put down my sword and shield and try to learn how to rest in His provision and His love and let Him fight for me. Two days later I tried to run and did 2 miles. The next time I did 3. And yesterday, I ran 4 miles totally pain free. If that’s not a wowza moment, I’m not sure what is.
But, of course, learning something once wouldn’t be enough for my stubborn resolve. My next financial deadline was in 2 weeks. Ah money, what a interesting little aspect. At that point I was $2500 away from meeting my deadline and I had the money that I could pull from my savings but after I just had my rear end handed to me for trying to be self-sufficient and I wasn’t about to have to learn a lesson more than once. So I did something completely opposite to every urge in my body, I trusted God.
And the thing is, I’m still trusting Him. Because funds take up to 4 days to process, I’m still a little over $1000 away, but I know that I’m going to, that it’s coming. I know that God is going to provide, because I have to, I have to believe in his faithfulness and trustworthiness because it is who He is and he can’t contradict himself.
So here is an invite to you. Partner with me. Pray and believe with me. Believe that God is who He says he is, and that he loves me more than I could ever image.
UPDATE: As of Christmas Eve I have reached, and surpassed, my deadline! Thank you so much for everyone who has supported me both financially and through prayer. My next deadline is in April, but with God and your help I would love to be able to leave fully funded. So keep praying and together we’ll look forward to how God is going to provide!
