It’s been a while. I wish I could say that it is purely because I have been insanely busy. But while this is true, I have been a bit busy, it is more accurate to say that I didn’t know what to write. Or how to write it.
And I was busy, so busy, but man, for so much of the past two months, I’ve been weighed down. It’s been an insanely stretching time and I’m now here in Mae Sot, Thailand where I’ve been able to breathe and rest and gain refreshment. Refreshment was something that I knew I needed much of last month in South Africa, but i couldn’t seem to allow myself to get it.
The last time I wrote, I was in Swaziland nearly two months ago. I didn’t believe my friend when he pointed this out to me. For an external processor, writing is a free therapy for me. I rarely travel anywhere without my journal and pen. I have been known to fill whole journals in less than a month. My journals are the musings of my mind, lyrics that seem to understand my heart, and prayers and praises to Papa. It’s my favorite way to connect with the Lord and writing is often how I hear from him.
If I’m not writing, I lose connection with myself and with God.
Now this is in my private journal, but the escaping thoughts of my heart and mind on those pages are the beginning steps to processing what shows up on here. And in the mess of my month in South Africa (we’ll get there, I promise), I did not feel as though I could process, nor would I allow myself the time to do so.
But I’m ready now. And I need to. I need to write. I need to process. I need to breathe and rest and be refreshed.
My hope now is to catch you up on the order of events, the wrestling of my heart and soul and the life I lived during South Africa and now here in the tropical Thailand.
p.s. thailand may be my favorite.
