I have been sitting here for hours just waiting for something to come out. I am a huge fan of writing, I have taken two creative writing classes, never being able to put my pen down. Now as a new blogger as a future world racer, my mind is blank.

Christmas has passed and the new year is quickly approaching us. I continue to brag about the things I will be seeing and the places I will be in the next year. As my family plans vacations for summer and I look at what day it is my anxiety gets the best of me. I am so sad to even think about spending 9 months without my family let alone the holidays. My mom is my absolute best friend, I have been through every up and down life has thrown at me with her. Leaving her along with my dog and whole family brings me to tears. My head is now full of doubt for this race now and I do not see the excitement as I once did. As I am brought to my knees asking God why me out of all the people you can call. Why does He have to have me?

I have the Bible app on my phone and when I opened it up the verse of the day was one that has lead me so much through this mission process and in this last year. Matthew 28:19 “Therefore go and make disciples of all nations baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit.” Every time I hear that verse I just want to go and do anything and everything for Jesus. He knew seeing this verse would brighten my day and give me the hope I needed. I was blessed to have been baptized this summer by my youth pastor. This step in my life filled me with joy I cannot explain and I now look forward to bringing the Father to children all over the world in hope they can feel the same joy I am able to have through Him. Many people are not blessed with the family I have, they do not have an amazing mother to treat them as a best friend. I see my parents love for me day in and day out, so many do not have this. When I think of people not having a mom like mine it truly upsets me but when I think of these people not knowing the true love of God that is just in fingertip reach of them it brings me pain. I know this year is not going to be easy and sometimes it may not even be fun but I was not put on this world to take every easy way of life. I was put here to serve my one true king and to bring all of His children home into His kingdom. The work I have been put here to do is hard but seeing Christ shine through people makes it all worth it and in the end is the kind of fun I wish everyone knew of. I will not give up on Him when things get rough and do not make me as happy as I wish to be. Jesus dying on the cross was not fair in the least it was grace.