Dear Family and Friends,
In this post I will be telling you about what the Lord has done in my life over the past six months. Ever since going on the World Race the Lord has been taking me deeper and deeper into his love and what it looks like to live with him. The past six months has been an extension of those revelations. I have some exciting news about my future, as well as a more detailed explanation of what Jesus has been up to in the life of Zack…
Before I get started, I would love to say thank you. For everyone who financially supported me during the Fellowship Program, I say thank you. Without your help I would not be here, and I would not be walking the path the Lord has revealed to me. For everyone who prayed for me, I say thank you. Jesus has come and done it again. He has completely changed my life, and I could not be happier. Through union with the Holy Spirit I know so clearly that my time here has been backed by the prayers of the many people who love and care for me. I am so blessed by all of you. I do not deserve to be a part of such an incredible body, but man oh man am I thankful for it!
Over the past six months Jesus has been dropping a series of bombs on me. I had no clue what I was getting myself into when I said yes to the Fellowship Program. I knew that I was called here and I knew that I was going to grow in a number of ways however, I had no clue what that would look like. I did not know what work I would be doing or who I would be working with, I just knew I was supposed to go. Sitting here now and looking back, I can honestly say that any expectation or hope that I had would be blown out of the water by what was to come.
Bomb Number One.
“We prayed about it, and we think you would be an awesome fit for Video in the Marketing Department.”
This is what I was told one week after the Fellowship Program had started. Did not see that coming. I thought in my six months here I would learn about how to become a great missionary. I thought I was going to learn how to thrive in my self-appointed calling of getting on my hands and knees and serving those who need it most. I had romanticized this idea of what a life for Jesus looks like and I thought the Fellowship Program was going to be the stepping stone I needed that would lead me to Africa, Asia, or who knows where.
I DID NOT think that I would be making videos. I had never done anything of the sorts before! Now some guy is telling me that he and some other leaders prayed about it and felt video was where I am supposed to be. I thought the Lord had flushed out any creative desire I had when I wasted it all on pot, alcohol, and a life of chasing the desires of the world. Little did I know that I was about to walk through one of the most redeeming, life giving, doors I have ever experienced.
A passion for storytelling has been birthed inside me, and video is the source of nutrients feeding this God given calling. I have constantly been overwhelmed by the amount of information still to learn, yet I have never been discouraged to keep moving forward. This is one of many reasons why I KNOW I am in the middle of God’s will over my life.
Bomb Number Two.
I have a full time job! I have never been able to say those words until now. With one week remaining in the Fellowship Program I was offered a full time role as Video Producer for Adventures in Missions. I took a week to pray about the offer, even though I only needed 10 minutes. I am still amazed by what the Lord has done in my life. It is a rewarding thought to know that the desires of his heart have now become my own. Who am I to be so blessed!?
God has breathed new life into an old love. Instead of using my creativity for my own pleasure or what the world deems “cool” I now get to use it for the good of the Kingdom, and for his glory! He has birthed a passion in my spirit for stories that have, and will, shape the reality for Heaven on earth!
Another great thing about this job is that is calls upon the body for help. Logic would tell me that fundraising is work, and it is, but it also presents the opportunity for the Lord to move in amazing ways. I have experienced this first hand, and even though my flesh does not always celebrate the need to fundraise, I have been floored by the goodness of Jesus through the love and support of the body. I know that this will keep me humble and on my knees at the foot of the cross.
Starting off I am going to need to support raise half of my total salary. This means I am going to need to raise $1,000 each month. Daunting as this may be, I know the Lord is going to have his way. For everyone who has supported me in the past, I ask you to pray about continuing this journey with me. If you have not supported me before and are reading this, I ask you the same, please pray about the opportunity and ask the Father if you are called to help the work of Adventures in Missions.
More about this position and my fund raising objectives will be posted in another blog and written in a personal letter. If you would like a copy please leave your email or address in the comment box at the bottom. You can also email me with any questions/concerns/comments at [email protected]
Bomb Number 3.
Outside of a calling and a job Jesus has taught me a life altering lesson. That lesson is this: Jesus is SO much more than a feeling. Over the course of all my Christian life I remember “Jesus moments” because of the way that I felt. Moments of pain, when I felt an overwhelming sense of peace. Moments of joy where all I could do was laugh or cry out of his goodness. Worship services where I could not contain myself and I had to jump around and dance.
Even during times of ministry, I had this thing that I would do to determine how effective that time would be. I would whisper the name of Jesus and if the hair on the back of my neck would stand up, I knew that it was go time. This feeling would give me confidence. This feeling would determine the amount of faith that I would have. I thought this system worked. I had seen God do some pretty amazing things, and left many encounters knowing that Jesus had shown up and that the Holy Spirit had done some super natural, unexplainable works.
Two months into the Fellowship Program all these feelings were gone. I would whisper “Jesus” and nothing would happen. I would be in worship services where I see people doing what I normally do, yet I could not feel a thing. My prayer life seemed like work. I wasn’t laughing as much, video wasn’t as exciting as it was a month ago. I had no clue what was happening. I was scared and bitter.
After nearly a whole month of this Jesus decided I had done my time, and the lesson was ready to be learned. He took me aside for a walk in the woods and we talked. He told me to go read about Job and understanding would be there for me.
For those who don’t know about the story of Job, or need a refresher. Job was a wealthy man of God. He had a family, many possessions and was living a great life by our standards. The enemy then came and started taking all this “stuff” from Job. Lost his house, lost his family, lost his health, he lost everything. Job started to get angry with God and question him. God then responds to Job in chapter 38 and onward.
I started in chapter one, felt the Holy Spirit tell me that wasn’t the right chapter. I kept flipping pages all the way to Job 38. Through the power of the Holy Spirit I was able to understand that God is so much bigger than all the stuff this world has to offer. He is the creator of everything. He is the giver of feelings, and he loves them, but he is still so much more than them. He has promises for my life and they are not determined about what I feel. They are true. No matter what. They are unshakeable and unbreakable. Jesus is real, even if the hair on the back of my neck doesn’t stand at the mention of his name.
I am so thankful for this lesson. My relationship with him has grown to a new level, and I know that I have come to understand him better through the process of learning. I also realize that the truth of this lesson carries over in my relationships with others as well. I love to feel, I really do, but I do not want my love to be conditional based on how I feel in a given moment. I have Jesus living in me whether I feel him or not. Such a valuable truth to REALLY know!
Once again, thank you all for you love and support. I am blessed beyond measure.
