As I contemplate the message of this blog, I am currently still processing how quickly everything in life can change and what I am to do when those changes seem to uproot the plan. I’ve mentioned in previous blogs how God has been walking me through my need to control the chaos in life and what it looks like to lay it down before Him to trust in His plans. That is exactly what I am having to do in this moment right now as things have taken a very unexpected turn.
You see, I have grown so much in my ability to not need to control situations or prevent situations from happening, which has tremendously helped my anxiety. To know that I don’t need to fix the brokenness of my life or the world around me, but rather let God be the author of what needs to play out in our lives, has allowed me to be fully confident in what He allows us to go through. It may hurt or not seem to make since at times, but what we go through is just another step in the journey of growth God is walking us through. I think the same can be said for my friend and brother in Christ, Ben Taylor in moments like these. Before explaining what that means for Ben, I need to walk you through my side of this story and what it means for me.
A few days ago marked another huge chapter in my life as I packed my bags to join World Race America less than a month after returning to the States from World Race Gap Year. I was so excited to join for a number of reasons such as evangelism in the the U.S., which has been on my heart for a long time. One of the other reasons was being able to do a lot of that evangelism with Ben whom had been on Gap Year with me for a season, but felt led to go home. Ben and I had become really close friends on Gap Year and so saying goodbye was tough. We really pushed each other to seek God and go forth sharing the love the Father has for us with others.
Needless to say, I was happy to have him back in my corner again and anxious to see how God was going to use us in this next season. It’s definitely going to look a lot different than I expected, but I guess that’s why you don’t rely on your expectations. Instead we rely on the Father and release our expectations so that we can step into the goodness of the plan He has laid before us.
My transition to World Race America had a few bumps to get here like a flight delay, missed flight, and losing a tent, but overall I was just glad to get here. Thankfully I was joining at their midpoint debrief. After the setbacks, it was good to meet everyone and catch up with Ben. We went on a few skates for old times sake and mainly just took the time to relax.
As a squad, we decided to do something fun for Fourth of July. Ben and I started off the day with a skate and getting to meet up with one of our squad leaders as she was traveling back home. After a good lunch we met up with the squad to have an afternoon of games in the park and planned on having a cookout that night while watching the fireworks. It seemed that the day was going so well, but that would soon change in an instance.
We were all playing a game of capture the flag and having a good time. I began to chase Ben who had just been unfrozen when out of nowhere a dog collided at full speed with Ben’s leg. There was a loud pop like the sound of a firecracker followed by agonizing shrieks from Ben. He fell to the ground screaming in pain and I looked at his leg which had been snapped clean at the shin. I went into immediate shock and didn’t know how to get the words out of me to call an ambulance. I knelt down by Ben trying to help keep him calm and eventually was able to yell for the others to get help.
The others rushed over while Dosson grabbed a phone and we all began praying over Ben. After what seemed like a lifetime, the paramedics got there and began helping Ben. I eventually had to step away from the scene as I was hearing Ben in such pain and could not get the visual of what happened out of my head. I felt sick and terrified for my friend because of the severity of the injury that had taken place.
To make a long story short, Ben had to have surgery on his leg that was broken in three different places and have a metal rod put in. Because of how intense the injury was, I knew that recovery was going to take quite some time. I knew it wasn’t feasible for Ben to stay with us and would need to go home. I didn’t want to admit this to myself because I had just been reconnected with him. The fact is, this is the reality of the situation. Ben will need at least a year for full recovery with physical therapy and so it just simply means he must go home. As much as I selfishly would want him to stay, God has a different story in mind. I know that God will still use Ben and I in this new season of life, even if it looks a lot different than we expected.
For Ben, I want to encourage him to just continue seeing things from God’s heart when it gets hard to understand why this happened. I know he wanted to be here and finish this thing out, but I firmly believe that God has him in a season of growth and further reliance. Ben will have to continue fighting both physically and mentally, but isn’t that just the story of life. As we both press into what the Father has in store for us in this new season, I can’t help but think that God has something really amazing in store. If anything, I know that God is going to strengthen our hearts in this season.
p.s.
Ben, I hope we can both find it in our hearts to forgive that dog and the owners and just see this as a blessing in disguise. I pray that we will see this as another step in God’s bigger picture and that it is happening for a greater reason than we currently understand. Get well soon buddy!
