Over the course of my time leading up to the World Race, I have been really focusing on who I am and my faith. I have really been trying to analyze my character and learn to live more like Jesus. Conviction has been in my heart over a lot of my flaws that I know I must work on. One that has recently surfaced and been brought to my attention is envy. One of the Ten Commandments in the Bible is “Thall shall not covet”, which means to not get jealous.
Lately, I have been doing this devotional that has really opened my eyes to some of my character flaws. Jealousy, which is another word for envy, is one of them. I realize that I often get jealous because I will compare my life to the lives of others. I will envy someone because they have more than me, or get to do more than I do. I am learning that is not how God wants me to think. God does not want us comparing ourselves to someone else, or trying to make our lives match or best someone else’s life. God created us all with our own strengths and weaknesses, our own individual purposes, and our own gifts to fulfill the purposes He has for us. So to compare our life to someone else or try to be like them, is meaningless. It also without formally saying it, states that the life God has given you is not good enough for you. It says that you have better ideas and plans for your life. There is no way that my plans or ways for my life will ever even come close to what God has for me if I allow Him to direct my path. God created only one Zach Trest, just like He only created one of you. He has a very distinct plan and purpose for each of us, so if we are busy trying to be like someone else, then we are missing out on what God has in store for us.
I have allowed envy to be a conflict in my life for far too long. It keeps my focus away from God and has me focused on other things that at the end of the day are pointless. All jealousy will do is bring me grief because I will always be wanting things that I can’t obtain. Jealousy will make me crave this world and the things of the world when God calls us to live in the world, but not of it. He wants us to have an eternal frame of mind and I think that’s something we forget way too often, is that this world is just temporary. All the things we tend fall victim to and believe are important in this world will one day disappear and we will stand before God and He will take into account how we spent our time on Earth.
Ecclesiastes 4:4 – “I observed all the work and ambition of envy. What a waste!”
Even with fundraising for the World Race I have let jealousy creep in. So far, I have not raised as much as some of the others and things aren’t going exactly how I pictured. Some of the other people in my squad have shared how great fundraising is going for them and the blessings they are receiving. I know it’s wrong of me, but I would get jealous of this and wonder why I wasn’t being blessed. I know that I should have been happy for them, but I let envy make me upset that they were doing better than me with fundraising. God does not want me to be jealous, but be happy for them. Sometimes I forget that things aren’t going to go according to my plans and I lose sight that it’s because God has something greater planned. Everything is on God’s timing and not mine and He has a purpose for it. He might have done it to teach me this lesson and have a blessing to come out of it. I do not know what He has planned and what His reasons are, but I am learning to just stay faithful to Him and work on my character through what He reveals to me. From now on I will work on not getting jealous, but rejoice in the good fortune and God’s blessings of those around me. I will also rejoice in the life and plan God has in store for me and embrace the fact that it is different from anyone else’s life.
Proverbs 14:30 – “A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones.”
