Day 83 :: Marla

One of my first visits back to the jail, I sat with Rosario for a while.  We had chatted a couple of times back in March, but nothing much because I mostly stuck with the men.  However, one of our first conversations on my return, she told me pretty much her whole family story.  She told me about Kim and Axel, and how her parents treated both of them and my heart just began to break.  Towards the end of the conversation, almost as an afterthought, she mentioned she had a third daughter, Marla.  I asked her why she waited so long to mention her and she said, “Well I haven’t seen her in almost 10 years.”

As I heard her story, I initially didn’t think much of it because Rosario had been in jail for over five years, but then I was curious as to why the other five years.  I pushed a little more into the story and found out that while Rosario was strung out on drugs one day, her father sold Marla to another man to marry off to his son.  Marla was 9 years old.  Unfortunately, because of her condition, Rosario couldn’t do much to fight her father’s decision and she just continued to spiral deeper and deeper into the drug scene until she finally landed in the Malaybalay City Jail.

When I hear stories like this, I try to fight getting so involved, but I can’t.  Hearing about her three girls, I knew I needed to help Rosario because despite her decisions, she’s worth another chance.  I began to dive deeper into her family tree and did everything I could to reconnect Rosario with her daughter.  Kim and Axel were easy because all it took was driving to Valencia and handing them the phone.  Marla would be a little bit more difficult.

I began to search everywhere to try and find some information on Marla.  We interviewed family, asked friends, tried to find the man she was sold too (who has disappeared), and even looked on Facebook.  I began to give up hope and even picture Marla in those bars I went to in Malaysia.  I tried not to think about it and just push Marla to the back of my mind, and luckily it was somewhat easy because of all the other things on my plate.

This past Wednesday, I went for my weekly visit to Kim and as usual, there were so many people in the house.  People were coming in and out, drunk and screaming, and I made eye contact with this girl that couldn’t be over 18, holding a baby.  She looked so familiar, but I had no idea why.  I just went down to visit Kim and talk with her for a few minutes and ask about Axel.  When I turned around, this girl was there, listening to our whole conversation.  Immediately it hit me.  I didn’t recognize this girl, I recognized the combination of Axel and Kim’s face.  When I asked my translator to ask her what her name was, she said, “Marla”.

I dropped to my knees and said, “You’ve got to be kidding me!”  She was a little shocked by my reaction, but I just told her we had been looking everywhere for her.  Come to find out, she heard about Kim’s situation, and even though Kim was four when she left, she had to come check on her little sister.  She confronted the man that sold her ten years ago and she was only in Valencia for those two conversations and would be leaving in a few hours.  I told her about Rosario and how she always asked if I had found her.  We invited her to ride to the jail with us and see her mother.  As soon as she heard, tears started flowing and she ran to grab her bag.

The ride seemed like it took forever with traffic, but we finally pulled into the jail property.  Rosario was expecting me to bring Kim and Axel to her that day, but when I went to get her out of her cell, I told her I couldn’t bring two of her daughters, but I found someone else.  She kept trying to guess who it was, but I just told her to be patient.  We walked into the visitors center and I pointed to her guest, and she just stared at her.  The longest five seconds went by as we all sat in silence before Rosario screamed out, “MARLA!”  It was a tearful reunion that I just had to walk away from.

I gave them a couple of hours to talk things over and reconnect, and then I returned because visiting hours were almost over.  When I returned, Marla informed me that she would be staying in Malaybalay and wanted to bring Kim here to stay under her care.  Rosario just looked at me and said, “I’ve found my baby.  And she has a baby.  And I’m a grandma.”  The next conversation was how we could get Kim and Axel there.  I was a little worried about how to legally handle these things, but since Marla is 18, she can legally claim custody in her mom’s stead without any argument from the grandparents.  So we set out to make another reunion.

I was a little worried about how the grandparents would respond, but they actually cheered when we told them we would be taking Kim, and all of a sudden became the most helpful people  around.  As much as this broke my heart to see grandparents act this way, I couldn’t shake how big Kim’s smile was.  I had never heard her say anything other than “Yes” and “Thank you”, but she talked then entire hour home to the jail.  When we carried Kim into the jail, all the guards cleared the way and made almost a tunnel for Rosario to run to her daughter.  We couldn’t find Axel, but hopefully she will return when she hears the good news.

Rosario came through the doors with a little more purpose today and she ran straight to her 60 pound, 14 year old daughter that had been in a prone position for several months.  The family is almost whole and they are getting their second chance to start over.  There’s still a long way to go with getting Kim healthy, and providing some livelihood for Marla as she takes care of a sick sister and an infant, but there is true joy in that family for the first time in a while.  As I left yesterday, Rosario said one last thing to me that I will never forget…