I missed yesterday. I even had the blog ready, but just never posted it. My bad. Well, here it is…
As many of you know, one of my favorite places to go and strike up random conversations is Barnes and Noble. Part of me likes it because the people there are so studious and focused and never see me coming. I never want to be a creeper or eavesdrop on someone’s conversation, but sometimes it’s impossible. I’m sitting one table away, and I think the barista behind the counter can hear everything that’s being said, but sometimes I just can’t keep my mouth shut.
Vanessa was on the phone with her mom and talking about this new job offer (I promise you I was reading and trying to mind my own business…). Towards the end of the conversation, I heard her say, “I just can’t wait to get out of this hell hole”. Immediately after hanging up, I could see the stress set in as she lit into her third cigarette since the beginning of the call. Right when she looked up, she noticed me sitting across from, she just smiled and tried to dodge eye contact like most polite people know to do. I guess I’m not totally polite because I just kept looking her way because I knew God was doing something. After a brutal few seconds, she apologized for being so loud on the phone, and I had my conversation starter.
Over the next few minutes, we caught up with small talk and I found out a little more about this new job offer. She had a smile plastered on her face the whole time that I could tell was painful for her to keep up, and the constant relighting of her cigarettes was an obvious sign she wasn’t comfortable. I finally just asked her if she thought this new job would solve her problems. She just said, “Well, it’s a start.” The follow up question wasn’t as easy, “OK, how?” It wasn’t fair to ask a random stranger that, but I didn’t need the answer, she did.
She stumbled over a few answers and I could tell she was having trouble. I told her that I was unemployed and that seemed to loosen her up a little. She started talking about how poor the job market is and how she didn’t think she would ever be able to do what she wanted. Then she made a critical mistake. She said to me, “Well you know how tough it to do what you’re passionate about in this economy. You just have to settle for what’s here.” I just smiled and said, “No. I don’t.”
The conversation was now taking a turn as she asked me to explain. I just laid out for her how if I keep living the life I’m living, I will never get a steady paycheck. I would be totally reliant and on the kindness and generosity of others to make my ends meet. But in the midst of it all, I would be doing exactly what I dream of doing and living a life of true fulfillment. I’m sure she was thinking I was some spiritual guru or hippie, but I didn’t care. What I do care about is that our generation (and some of those prior) are falling into a trap that is destroying one dream after another and turning us all into stressed out workaholics or unemployed slackers.
First off, jobs are good. But when we put the paycheck as top priority, we lose sight of what it is that we really love and fall for something we should never settle for. I may be an idealist, but what would it look like if more people were actually excited, or at least hopeful, for whatever it is today holds? Maybe then we would stop dreaming about “the day we make it” and start seizing the day we have.
