I've been back on U.S. soil for two months today.
Yes, it's surreal. I've hugged my family, my friends and spent countless hours catching up on life with those I love.
I've also spent hours frustrated, annoyed and angry. At myself.
I wanted to come back and be this different person. A person who loved well. Who was noticeably 'better' and 'changed' and just dramatically different and everyone loved being around.
I'm not saying I'm not. I'm just saying that's a lot of pressure. It's not true to who I am. I do love well, and what does 'better' look like anyway?
Now I'm also not saying it's been terrible being home, but it's been hard. I put expectations, not on others, but on MYSELF. Disappointing ourselves hurts the most, I think. I was so excited to be in AMERICA (!!!) and now I miss AFRICA even if I had to sleep on the floor and share a bathroom with 6 other people, and 'bathroom' is an exaggeration.
I guess…things are confusing. And the grass is always greener.
But Jesus is alive wherever we are. And life is beautiful wherever we live it.
We can always love better. It's realizing we need to that's half the battle.
love being reunited with these beautiful sisters!
Now that I've been home for a couple of months, the question is always: What are you doing next? I realize that 'trying to survive' is no longer a valid answer.
The answer to that question, for at least the next 10 months is: California!
I will be a student at Bethel School of Supernatural Ministry in Redding California, beginning in September. I spent a lot of time this past year reading and listening to podcasts of the leaders of Bethel Church (and the school). I can say that they had a huge impact on how I have seen the love of Jesus and the transformation in my own love affair with Jesus. I am so excited for the opportunity to go sit under the leadership of these great men and women of God this next year.
While in school, I will be spending 4 days a week in classes on leadership and scripture among other things. I will serve with the church, do missions work and just LOVE PEOPLE.
My long term dream is to see the church, the bride of Christ, come alive, and embrace WHO we are as a body, as a force to be reckoned with in this crazy world. That happens through love. Loving God and loving people. The gospel of the love of Jesus, is radical enough to change the world. How does the church effectively do that?
Man, I love the church. You and me, we are the church. I love the simplicity and beauty of the church. And I want to see the bride be fully alive. That's what God has placed in my heart.
This next year in ministry school will help prepare me in realizing the fullness of this dream, and what exactly my place in the church looks like.
If you want to give to my tuition, feel free to do so using this link: Give
My plan is to have a part time job this next year, so please be in prayer for doors to be opened in that area.
Thank you to all my supporters for the past year. You were a huge part of everything that happened, every child I fell in love with, every sermon I preached, every mistake I made and every lesson I learned. This wouldn't have happened without you. Thank you.
Please feel free to email me via the contact me link on my blog for more information. I would love to get coffee and share about this past year with you!
