Upon my team’s arrival into our host’s home (quickly literally after we put our bags down), we were given Rwandan names, (1) so the locals could remember our names and (2) as a means of connecting to their culture.
James and Olivia named us, based simply on our looks and mannerisms. I was named Mahoro.
Mahorow means peace or one who brings peace in Kenya-Rwandan.
“Ironic and crazy”, were the first thoughts that came to me when I was told the meaning of my name because at the time and even upon arrival to their home I felt anything but at p e a c e.
I felt broken-hearted about saying bye to the team I had just gotten to know; weary about having yet another new community and this time an established one; and was just altogether ready to go home. I felt all of this suddenly and fully the first night we came to James and Olivia’s home and I cried like I had never before. I’m also quite sure that if our home had WiFi, I would’ve looked up plane tickets to go home (and may have purchased one). Even more tempting, was the circumstance where we are living: we live right behind an international airport. Like literally we can go take a short walk and watch planes land and take-off.
And so in my hurt and round-a-bout thoughts, I gave to God what I was feeling and thinking (something I have thankfully developed and have been encouraged to do on the Race); my hurt, my grievances, my sadness, my desires to go home and be done with the Race, essentially my all.
But God is a redeemer. He is THE Redeemer.
Jesus said, “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” [John 14:27]
In my troublesome thoughts and exhaustion from crying most of the night, I went about the next day covering up what I was going through, not wanting to burden my new teammates especially since I did not know some of them. The crazy thing is not even 24-hours later, in the evening the next day, the Spirit of the Lord came in as a strong, formidable force. Olivia, our host mom had taken some of my teammates and I out to pray over the community at their church, but was led instead to share her testimony and used it as a teaching moment, asking us what we learned from it. Taylor went first and we went around in a circle sharing our responses. Before last it was my turn, and I had shared how I was encouraged by the part of her story where she found it difficult to share with her senior pastor about her family situation, wanting to protect her family and keep it under wraps as part of her reasoning for not being able to go to university. I shared how I related to her in that moment as I had just recently gone through a lot (not stating what had happened the night prior) and how I didn’t feel like I was ready to share that with my new team. In addition, I told her how weird and foreign my Rwandan name felt as I didn’t feel at peace since we had left our debrief site.
And well, that was when the dam broke and the Spirit of the Lord was poured o u t !
As soon as I finished up my response, Olivia started affirming truths over me and prophesied what would come to be in my life:
“This new team will be the best yet.”
“You will be the one to restore and bring reconciliation to your family.”
“You will meet someone who will change your life as soon as you leave Rwanda/go back home.”
“You are so dearly loved by God. God loves you God loves you. God loves you. God loves you.”
This went on for a long while (what left like a lifetime), and ended with everyone praying over me and then we prayed for each other. If there’s anything you need to know about me, it’s that having attention of any kind scares me and I try to swerve as far from it as I can. I never once thought in my life that such a thing as this could or would ever happen to me. I thought this sort of thing only happened to a leader or someone with a title, but not someone like me; someone who is shy and quiet, who tries her best to be invisible and stay out of sight.
But yet God still came and met me where I was and and used the community I was unfamiliar with to show me this.
“And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” [Philippians 4:7]
I was finally overcome with p e a c e.
Just like that, the reason God highlighted these last two countries on the Race for me came to light. The reason to persevere, push on and continue to use all that I have learned on the Race to do so. From going to God in my brokenness to being vulnerable with my new community where I was at. Being vulnerable was and still is scary and probably will be for a while, but I now have the full strength to continue to believe and trust in God.
So here’s to looking forward to more of God’s splendor and goodness! Hope you guys were encouraged by this 🙂
Here’s my NEW (and hopefully) last team (from left to right): Taylor, Rachel, me, Jenny, Edna, Jaivie and Cristina
BONUS:
Because they took this selfie on my phone 🙂 Thanks Jaivie and Cristina! Hope you both learned your lesson!
