Rewind to Kenya. It was one of the hardest months on the
race. Many things were not working out the way I desired them to. After that
month I realized that the Lord was taking things from me. Things like my
relationships, my team, ministry and even my debit card weren’t working out. It
was because the Lord was calling me to him. When I am weak he would be strong.
(Read about it here.)
But it has been a struggle.
I have still put my relationships and other things before the Lord on the race
after Kenya.
And I realized, this month, that it goes past just on the
race and that month in Kenya. In my past I have sought after relationships
instead of the Lord. I would try to find my fulfillment in them instead of in
the Lord. But in the end I would usually end up being hurt by these
people and left feeling alone. At the same time I have always had a
bigger desired to draw closer to the Lord and intimacy with him. And,
obviously, the Lord knows my heart and this huge desire. So my relationships
haven’t even worked liked I desired because all my life the Lord has been
calling me.
He says ‘come to
me’ because he will only truly love and satisfy me.
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Read Hosea 2
Therefore I will block her path
with thornbushes;
I will wall her in so that she cannot find
her way.
She will chase after her lovers
but not catch them;
she will look for them but not find them.
Then she will say,
‘I will go back to my husband as at first,
for then I was better off than now.’
She has not acknowledged that I
was the one 
who gave her the grain, the new wine and
oil,
who lavished on her the silver and gold”
which they used for Baal.
“Therefore I will take
away my grain when it ripens,
and my new wine when it is ready.
I will take back my wool and my linen,
intended to cover her nakedness.
So now I will expose her lewdness
before the eyes of her lovers;
no one will take her out of my hands.
I will stop all her celebrations:
her yearly festivals, her New Moons,
her Sabbath days”all her appointed feasts.
I will ruin her vines and her fig
trees,
which she said were her pay from her
lovers;
I will make them a thicket,
and wild animals will devour them.
I will punish her for the days
she burned incense to the Baals;
she decked herself with rings and jewelry,
and went after her lovers,
but me she forgot,”
declares the LORD.
“Therefore I am now going
to allure her;
I will lead her into the desert
and speak tenderly to her.
There I will give her back her
vineyards,
and will make the Valley of Achor a door
of hope.
There she will sing as in the days of her
youth,
as in the day she came up out of Egypt.
“In that day,”
declares the LORD,
“you will call me ‘my husband’;
you will no longer call me ‘my master. ‘
I will remove the names of the
Baals from her lips;
no longer will their names be invoked.
In that day I will make a
covenant for them
with the beasts of the field and the birds
of the air
and the creatures that move along the
ground.
Bow and sword and battle
I will abolish from the land,
so that all may lie down in safety.
I will betroth you to me
forever;
I will betroth you in righteousness and
justice,
in love and compassion.
I will betroth you in faithfulness,
and you will acknowledge the LORD.
“In that day I will
respond,”
declares the LORD”
“I will respond to the skies,
and they will respond to the earth;
and the earth will respond to the
grain,
the new wine and oil,
and they will respond to Jezreel.
I will plant her for myself in the
land;
I will show my love to the one I called
‘Not my loved one.’
I will say to those called ‘Not my people,
‘ ‘You are my people’;
and they will say, ‘You are my God.’
The Lord compares and
demonstrates His love for Israel through Hosea and Gomer.
The Lord is my Hosea.
(The bold are the
direct parallels to my life.)
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A friend once said
“Sometimes it just matters that you are on the path. We will never make it to
perfection. The important part is the pursuit.�
A.W. Tozer said “They
morned for Him, they prayed and wrestled and sought for Him day and night, in
season and out, and when they found Him the finding was all the sweeter for the
long seeking.�
I may mess up and
get distracted on the way.
But I just need to
continue to pursue.
