One week….two weeks….three weeks had passed since Anthony’s death.
The death that we were convinced was only temporary.
And though I didn’t want to admit it, I was wrestling with God.
He hadn’t changed. He was still good. He was still love. He was still sovereign.
I still believed that with all my heart…
But I had questions.
“Why, God?”
“Why would You speak the same thing to all of us (20+ people)?…”
“…that Your desire was to raise Anthony from the grave?”
“If Your will wasn’t ultimately to bring him back to life, then why speak that to us in the first place?”
I was having a tough time reconciling it all in my mind.
…
Until one night during dinner in Guatemala, over a month since everything happened.
I was describing our struggle with the Anthony situation to the AIM staff and coaches who were visiting for debrief, when Roger’s (one of our coaches) wisdom brought just the healing I needed.
…
He reminded me of the story of Abraham and Isaac…
God tells Abraham:
“Offer your only son, whom you love, as a burnt offering to Me.” (Gen. 22:2)
Assumption: Isaac is going to be sacrificed.
Abraham listened, believed, obeyed and trusted God. He walked by faith in His word.
Just as Abraham is carrying out God’s instructions, preparing both the altar and his son, the Lord calls him off and provides a different sacrifice.
All signs pointed to go.
Abraham stepped out in faith.
But the outcome was unexpected.
Isaac wasn’t sacrificed after all…He was spared.
Abraham’s job?
Obey the voice of the Lord and trust the outcome to Him.
“Has the Lord as much delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices as in obeying the voice of the Lord? Behold, to obey is better than sacrifice…”
(1 Samuel 15:22)
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding.” (Proverbs 3:5)
“Without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is and that He is a rewarder of those who seek Him.”
(Hebrews 11:6)
“‘My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways My ways’, declares the Lord. ‘For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts higher than your thoughts.'”
(Isaiah 55:8-9)
…
Now how about the story of Anthony…
God seemed to say to us:
“Pray and ask. Believe that I want to bring Anthony back to life.”
Assumption: Anthony will be brought back to life.
We listened, believed, obeyed and trusted God. We walked by faith in His word.
Just as we are carrying out God’s instructions, finding Anthony, fasting and praying for His earthly life to continue, the Lord chooses to keep him for Himself.
All signs pointed to go.
We stepped out in faith.
But the outcome was unexpected.
Anthony didn’t come back to life after all…he was taken home.
Our job?
Obey the voice of the Lord and trust the outcome to Him.
…
For Abraham, God used this as a test of his faith and obedience. (Genesis 22:1)
Maybe the same was true for us?
We began with faith the size of a mustard seed
and stepped out of the boat.
Each step we took after that
increased our faith more and more
Until we were walking on water
with faith the size of a mountain.
…
All a gift from God.
The gift of F.a.i.t.h.
Being assured of things hoped for…
Convinced of things not seen.
(Hebrews 11:1)
To walk in faith for once…to be more shocked when Anthony didn’t come back to life than if he would have…to truly, wholeheartedly, without a single doubt, believe God…
It was freedom.
It was joy.
It was life.
God brought LIFE in DEATH…through FAITH.
This is where we found Anthony’s body…Denise wrote this in the sand as we were following the footsteps of the men carrying him in his casket.
A few more key scriptures:
“So will My word be which goes forth from My mouth; it will not return to Me empty, without accomplishing what I desire, and without succeeding in the matter for which I sent it.”
(Isaiah 55:11)
“For I know that the Lord is great and that our Lord is above all gods. Whatever the Lord pleases, He does, in heaven and in earth, in the seas and in all deeps.”
(Psalm 135:5-6)
“And all these (read Hebrews 11), having gained approval through their faith, did not receive what was promised, because God had provided something better for us, so that apart from us they would not be made perfect.”
(Hebrews 11:39-40)
