Life on the Race is like nothing you have ever experienced before. Jeff Tyner, of the January 2013 M Squad, wrote this list of ways to know your weird life is that of a World Racer.
You know you are a World Racer when …
1. You consider a city 500 miles away to be "very close."
2.You speak with authority on the quality of bus travel.
3. You sort your friends by continent.
4. You can’t remember how to speak in complete sentences.
5. You've spoken in dozens of churches, but you are not a pastor.
6. You stockpile peanut butter.
7. Seeing an entire family on one motorbike looks normal.
8. The majority of your fights revolve around food.
9. All preaching sounds better on hard, wooden benches.
10. You no longer care if the water you are brushing your teeth with is bottled or even boiled for safety.
11. You haggle with everyone for a lower price.
12. You'll use pretty much any facility available to relieve yourself…regardless of how clean (or dirty) it is.
13. A 9:00 am start time happens no earlier than noon.
14. You hoard napkins from places that actually have them because you know you'll need to use them as toilet paper at some point.
15. You haven't seen a sofa in months.
16. When you really have to go, you see a potato chip bag as a feasible option.
17. You fit 52 people, 102 bags, and nine musical instruments into one school bus, and you realize the driver brought two friends along for the ride.
18. You slip your portion of “manuture cheese” onto your friend’s plate hoping they won’t notice.
19. You think fanny packs have actually come back in style.
20. The free table at debrief is like shopping at the mall.
21. Fitting 15 or more people in a car seems normal to you, and there is always room for one more.
22. Staying two days in the airport is actually preferred because it means you'll have air conditioning, western toilets, and food other than rice.
23. A fancy night out consists of cheeseburgers and milk shakes.
24. You have not showered in seven days.
25. You're not sure if the tan line on your feet is from the sun or the dirt you've been walking in for five months.
26. You've finally thrown away your malaria meds to save space.
27. You think the space cleared up by removing your malaria meds will actually make your pack lighter and less crowded.
28. You would sell your right arm for a cold pop and a Snickers bar.
29. You pay for a hotel just to take a real shower and sit in the AC.
30. You ministry contact lets you borrow a pair of jeans and you poop HIS pants.
31. You get up and walk out of a restaurant in protest because an entire meal cost more than $2.
32. Your IV bag gets nailed to the wall.
33. You have to hike two and half hours down the side of a mountain just to use the Internet.
34. Your food budget is a mere $3 per day.
35. Washing your clothes means wearing them into the shower.
36. An idea of a productive night is picking lice out of your friend’s hair.
37. You justify eating bugs by arguing that they increase your protein intake.
38. You prefer others by being intentional about calling them up and encouraging them to be free. They respond simply by saying "so good."
39. You have 17 bracelets on one arm.
40. You ride a bus five hours one way just to get to a McDonald’s.
41. You favorite person’s name is Bug.
42. You contemplate donating everything that you own and living the remainder of year with two outfits, a Nalgene, and your toothbrush.
43. You refer to months of the year as countries.
44. Killing cockroaches turns into family game night.
45. Your ambulance driver stops for a Coke on the way to the hospital. Twice.
46. Alone time consists of turning your back and turning your iPod up.
47. Before ordering a meal, you make sure the restaurant’s wifi works.
48. At a restaurant, you eat leftover food off a stranger’s plate because you can't believe they didn't finish it.
49. You have an actual flat spot on you butt from sitting on the floor all the time.
50. You call 54 ragamuffin nomads your family.
I love you M Squad!
