Disclaimer to future Racers => Feedback is a part of the world race culture, its your choice to embrace it or run from it. I would highly encourage you to embrace it. However, if you choose to run from it, don't be surprised when you get home and realize your the same exact person you were when you left.
It's hard
It's uncomfortable
It has the potential to be life changing
It's a gift
It's totally biblical
It's something to take back and implement into all areas of your life
Feedback Lies:
You can run a good race without it
It doesn't matter
Your team members don't care
It's just a way to attack each other
It's ment to hurt your feelings
I'll be honest with you,
I am currently finishing up month 4 on the race and have barely realized how important feedback really is. The purpose of feedback is to challenge those around you to grow in the character of God. The heart of feedback is love.
I struggled day in and day out with giving and recieving feedback for my first 3 months of the race. The problem was rooted in my perception of feedback. I viewed feedback as a platform to attack character. I viewed constructive feedback as a means of letting people know what bugs you. Because of my incorrect perception I rarely gave constructive feedback…. Because I didn't want people to think I didn't like them or was trying to tear them down…… and I didn't recieve constructive feedback at all because I always felt like it was given out of emotion, and because certain people didn't like me. Due to this, I harbored feelings against someone on my team. I felt like she attacked me, and because I did not embrace feedback, I kept it all in until it became an elephant in the room.
Not embracing feedback can cause division!
When you choose not to embrace feedback, you are essentially choosing division. Yes! Division is a choice! You choose division because you choose to forgoe good communication. I should have never allowed myself to wait 1-2 months to address issues that could have easily been solved in month 2 of my race. Choosing not to communicate allowed for little divisions to grow. Guys, this is not okay!!
The truth is proper feedback is given in love. Feedback is not about emotion! This means whether it's hard or not, you trust that your team member is giving out of love, and with the intentions of helping you grow in the character of God. If you keep this at the heart of ALL your feedback, there is no room for division or misconceptions!
I had a conversation and made some apologies today that should have been done a long time ago! That's on me.
I challenge you not to make the same mistakes. Your time on the race is really short. Dont waste it harboring ill emotions or bitterness.
I challenge you to speak hard truths, and speak them in love!
I challenge you to challenge those around you with the words that come from your mouth!
It's biblical! Paul did it! Just check out 1 Corinthians 1. He really sets feedback up for us.
1. He calls out the character of God in them => Holiness. They are made Holy by Christ.
2. He thanks them.
3. Calls them into unity and harmony, and then gives them examples of how they have not been doing this (quarreling).
Pauls intention was to call them into the people that God intended them to be. We should go into feedback with the same intention.
A good example is this (this did not happen, but some good feedback came from a similar sitch):
Hey Trish, you are an amazing women of God. You are a truth seeker. You are called to speak life and not death. You are called to encourage and build up. A situation occured today when we were playing uno. You told Cody you were going to sock her, because she gave you a draw four card. Even though it was said light heartedly, it made the atmosphere a little tense. I really want to challenge you to seek to speak life in all situations, even when we are just having fun and playing games..
BAAAM!!!! There you go!
We are all called to speak truth…. even when it's hard!!!
