Ok, Here I go. I have written countless blogs but always end up deleting them because I dont think they are sufficient enough. But this one, it's it. Theres no turning back. I need to just commit to my writing.
They tell us to write a blog about our expectations for our trip on the World Race. Simple, right?!? Ehh, wrong answer… atleast for me anyways. I guess I have been contemplating the question for two long.. Im one of the overthinker types.
However, I do know I really do not have a lot of expectations for the Race… because I've heard that you never get what your expect. Which I totally understand, because God has already totally changed my expectations. I came into the world race totally committed to the September Route 2. I spent 6 months planning on this route, prepping, and then God shakes something up in my heart… and I know I can't leave in September. Instead, he places the January 2013 Route 3 in my heart.. Which is pretty much completely different. Instead of: Thailand Cambodia, Vietnam/Laos, Dominican Republic, Haiti, Mozambique, Swaziland, Tanzania, Romania, Moldova, Ireland…. Its China, Philippines, Honduras, El Salvador, Guatemala, Albania, Romania, India, Uganda, Kenya, and Tanzania. Only Tanzania and Romania are the same. Looking back, I am surprised I am not heartbroken over having to cut off Ireland…. but God has given me so much peace over this route. So expectations… Yeah! God's already set the bar for my trip… Hes already blowing my expectations up… So I dont really have a lot.
I am expecting Christmas to be extremely hard, because it is so close to when I leave. I expect tears and snot on Christmas eve…. expecially when thinking about leaving my niece. I expect when I return, that I am not even going to recognize her… I expect her not to understand why I am leaving, and take it really hard… because she is already questioning why I am leaving… I expect her to be so grown up when I get back… SHe is five now… will be six in september… and seven when I return. Whoa! This part is goign to be so hard for me, because she is such a big part of my life.
I expect that leaving my church family is going to be super difficult as well. I have been with them since the beginning… and its crazy to think about spending almost a year away. I expect that leaving my youth is going to be one of the hardest parts of this. I have served as a youth leader there for years… adn just recently took over as High School Pastor…. and as I was talking to them on sunday about my trip, one girl I thought knew, but didnt… Said "your leaving us!" My heart dropped to my stomache. I expect discipling someone to take my place in the youth to be challenging. Oh this whole process in leaving my family there, I expect it to be tear jerking.
I expect to have best friend withdrawls. I've know my bestie since the 4th grade… She is awesome.. and I really wish she was going with me… I know we didnt talk for a year in college over stupid stuff…. but I cant imagine being away from her that long now….
I also expect this journey to be hard. I expect to be broken and challenged and changed time after time… for the whole 11 months! I expect God to show up and blow me out of my wildest dreams. I expect to live and love like Jesus with other people just trying to live and lvoe like Jesus.
Oh, and I expect to come face to face with countless birds… wich at that point in time I will probably scream, cry, and amybe run away… because I am terrified of birds…. and all I read about on blogs is chickens. lol. So I expect to be a little less affraid by the time I come home…
Most of all, I expect to fall in love with my savior over and over and over as I encounter this world and the people he loves head on.
