Blogging: A personal chronological log of thoughts that are published; an online diary.
That last part catches my eye: an online diary. No, my blogging will not be my own personal “online diary,” but I do want my blog to be personal. I want my blog to be inviting and really allow people to get to know me. I want my blog to be an invite to a friendship (new and old) and also to inspire you, yes YOU, to dream bigger, take more risks, and to just simply live more knowing that you are loved by God.
So how do I create a blog that is inspiring, encouraging, motivating etc? I think the best way I can do that is by being open, being real. I could easily just share all the happy things in my life, but that wouldn’t be honest. There are many tough situations I have gone through and will continue to be challenged with. I believe that it is part of my mission to share these moments with you, because this is me overcoming my fear of being “known.” I hope that as you read my stories, dreams, struggles, passions and more that you will leave a comment or send me a message so I can pray and encourage you in all that you’re doing in your life.
Story Time
I recently lost my best friend. (No, he didn’t die. Thank goodness!) My best friend for the past year (and some months) was Seth. He was my boyfriend, my encourager, my favorite person to be around and spend time with. He taught me a lot about investing in relationships and learning to love myself, to really love who I am.
He decided to end our relationship last week. It was sad. I was hurt. Confused. Lonely. Questioning myself and what I did wrong many times. We broke up because he didn’t see our life going in the same direction. I want marriage one day, hopefully in the next few years, and he is very set on not even being engaged within the next 5 years. Different desires and passions yall, sometimes it works out great….other times not so well.
For the past week, I have been fighting. Fighting the lies that say
You’re not pretty enough
You’re not good enough
He left because you’re selfish
He found someone better
Why would anyone ever date you?
I’m admitting it. These have been common thoughts lately, and I am fighting. Fighting hard. It’s not easy, and it’s not fun. It’s not easy for me to type all of these words and be vulnerable, not knowing how others will respond to my story.
But. Yes, BUT. I will share these things because I KNOW there is Good that The Lord will bring to my story.
He already has…
One week after my break up, I started reading a book by Beth Moore called “Believing God.” (Go buy it now – I’m only in chapter 3 and already know it’s going to change my life!) As I was reading, Beth shares a prayer over her readers in the book:
“Through the power of Jesus’ name, I have asked Him to show you a wonder or somehow visibly bless your diligent cooperation early in the process so that you will be encouraged to press on.”
Yes, Lord! I want to receive all the blessings!! (Haha, but seriously). When I read this sentence last week, I just mindlessly skimmed over the words and thought nothing of it. However, I re-read Chapters 1-3 today (it’s that good ya’ll!) and when I saw this sentence, I stopped. I held the page open and read each word carefully over and over. Because I had a miracle happen the day I first read these pages last week. I had a miracle, and didn’t even realize it because I was so distracted by the lies of the enemy.
My miracle? A friend of mine donated $600 dollars to my World Race mission trip. Six Hundred Dollars. I won’t reveal her name to respect her privacy, but I will tell you that she is my age, paying her way through school, having major car issues, YET she gave me $600 because that is how devout her faith is in The One True God.
I share all this with you to encourage you to open your eyes. Look around. Take in all the blessings and miracles in your life. The enemy will do anything and everything he can to distract you, to pull you away from God, to make you question if He really loves you. So, you have a choice. You can choose to believe the lies, or you can fight. I choose to fight, because I refuse to waste my life believing lies. Your life and mine, they’re worth fighting for.
Through it all, through all the bad and all the good, I will continue to seek Him. I will continue to trust Him. I will continue to love Him. I pray that you will too. Here is my prayer for you:
LORD, I pray that you bless this reader right now. I pray that you comfort, guide and speak to him or her in this moment. I pray that you lift any burdens they have been carrying for too long, and remind them how much You love them. I pray for peace and abundant miracles in their life. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
Love & Blessings,
Tori
