When we know how much He loves us, we can’t help but crave with an unquenchable hunger the dire need to spread His love to those who need to be fed!
Love is and always will be the most powerful, immovable, potent force on the planet. The more we ask for Jesus, the more we ask to seek love in all the depths He designed it!
There comes a point in our journey with Jesus when we really want to experience the love He has for us. Mine happened to come as I bowed on my knees begging for freedom from an evil that had had a grip on my life for far too long.
His love hits me often and most of the time leaves me in tears, as I stand before Pappa and allow Him to wash over me. It hits me when I see Him; in all his many forms, interwoven around the world.
But yesterday was so different. I almost felt like it was a turning point in the experience of His love because as I gazed out the windows to see the stunning nature of El Salvador, He spoke in not words but love- directly to my heart. I felt for a few moments His love for me and it moved me to tears. I felt an embrace come around me and say there is even more than the amazing more I have allowed you to know thus far. There is and always will be limitlessly more.
My love revelation came on a bus ride through El Salvador to Guatemala. It came when I felt in my heart the abounding love CHRIST had for me, the love that He went to the cross for…for me. It’s my favorite time of day, right before 5. I truly think God made the evening as a time of unwind and for those who love to sit back and watch the beauty of rest on the soul.
These past 8 months have been crazy. Crazy in regards to the truth He has knit into me, the community He has surrounded me with, and the world He has so specially shown to me. The brokenness, the radiance, and all the in between. He has shown me that no matter what happens in this life that I am free, loved, and forever victorious. A butterfly never returning to the caterpillar she once was, but a daughter who has truly found her wings.
To know a love this great is almost too great but He is a Father of immense goodness and hope. He wants us to stand on the tops of all the mountains we thought would crush us and He wants us to shine so sweetly with loveliness that we stop those around us in a beautiful display of His heart.
I had struggled with eating disorders for 10 years. I never thought I would be healed. As much as I may have mentally thought I was before the Race, I wasn’t. The Race hasn’t healed me, but God has used it to show me that I am truly free and healed. I feel as if it was never a piece of me but a huge part of my story if that makes sense. Like I have learned the lessons and been released of the scares to share with the world as beauty. It’s pretty amazing!
I am going home much lighter in a physical and spiritual sense, getting healthy and loving myself by His love; but I am also going home not needing to be in control, not needing people’s approval, not needing to seek anything other than to remember the simple truth that I am loved and loved with a love that is deep, wide, long and high. Loved with a love that desires for me to know the fullness of my Maker and that love has set me free. This love has cast out fear and for the first time, I feel I can share a testimony from the standpoint of the victor. Not that I haven’t always been one, but truly one of the heart now- a daughter of radiance set atop a mountain, in a meadow of sunflowers dancing before the Father and knowing- this is the place I was made to be…before Daddy, dancing and radiating, dancing and shinning, dancing and bringing Him glory through the very power of His love!
