My whole life, I have walked the line between living in the world, and living for God. Most often, instead of walking the line, I have had 2 feet in the world, barely keeping that line in sight.
I have always known that I have a savior. That truth has lived inside of me for as long as I can remember. A truth that has whispered to me even in my darkest times. Even in my deepest doubts, His spirt whispers. At times that has angered me. I didn’t know what to do with it. Be perfect? That was impossible, so I just stopped thinking about it instead. Even those times…when I looked just like the world, His spirit convicted me.
This sort of division inside of a person has the power to destroy. A house divided cannot stand. So even though I would’ve walked away from God, He has never let me go…
Events fell apart. The things in my life that I was holding so tightly – my career, my relationship, my future, my PLAN – it all failed to quiet my soul.
ALL OF MY LIFE, my soul has been restless. Nothing I did – no relationship, no job, no hobby, no PLAN – ever quenched the thirst of my soul. I was always hungry, always restless, always searching and never content. I’d think, What is the point? Is this really what life is about? A job, a family, kids…that’s it…
And this thought kept pulling at me, God. Jesus tells us that He is living water. People who drink His water never thirst again. Jesus tells us that he leaves a gift for us that the world can’t give – peace of mind and soul. Jesus tells us that whoever gives up their life for His sake, finds it. He says that He came to give us abundant life…
And to me, those were always nice ideas. I’d think, yah that sounds good but what am I supposed to do with it. I need concrete things here!
Then I started seeking Him. What is his love, His peace, His promises…what if these are real, tangible things. What if my whole idea of what life “should” look like isn’t the meaning of life? What if this life isn’t even about me??
He says that if we seek Him, we will find Him.
He never let me go. I sought Him. I found him. God is not an idea. He is not a postcard or a Pinterest poster. He is living and his promises are concrete; so concrete you can base your life on them. You can give up your life, your control, and find abundant life in a relationship with Christ.
What a life-changing, ETERNITY-changing truth.
My soul is at rest.
My soul is at rest. Amen.
