I’ve never understood when people said “My favorite country is ________.” How can anyone possibly pick a favorite place when you’ve only seen fraction of the World? How do you choose when each place is so overwhelmingly unique? But the answer is no longer a mystery.
The bus ride into Granada, Nicaragua was long and uneventful. It was dark outside when we arrived, and I was too tired to function. I had fallen ill, and I could barely keep my eyes open. After three days of travel, and very little sleep, I was grumpy, aggravated, and done. But when my feet touched Nicaraguan ground for the first time, my switch was flipped. I just didn’t know it yet.
It wasn’t until my teammates and I arrived at our home in San Jorge, that I realized how special this place would be. Our little apartment, behind our church, nestled in a farm field, and surrounded by volcanic islands; it took my breath away. I’ve never seen His presence so evidently before. I remember walking into the field and staring in awe at the beautiful scenery that I get to call my “backyard”, and whispering to myself “Lord, you are so present here.” I saw Him so clearly in everything and everyone around me. It was then that I realized how truly beautiful, simple, and pure my home was. And it was then that I realized how much this place would change my heart.
Detox. This is my team’s word for this month. Spending the month alone, just us six girls, is new to us all. And truthfully, it sounded almost torturous at first. I remember psyching myself out, saying things like, “I might as well be living in a sorority house. I’m going to loose my mind.” Boy, oh boy was I wrong. This month has been filled with lip syncing battles, daily soak sessions, prayer, sisterhood, runs on the beach, and love. Without doubt, one of the best months of my life. This month was built for spiritual, emotional, and physical health. There’s something so beautiful about the life we get to live this month.
But, it wasn’t until three days in that I realized that this would be the place that broke my heart. It wasn’t until I met the kids we would be working with that I realized how hard it would be to walk away. Never in my life have I met anyone who loves as freely, deeply, and openly as the people I’ve met here. The second they learn your name, they want nothing more than to love and to be loved by you. It doesn’t matter if you’re sharing a meal, playing “down by the banks”, or letting them braid your hair, they’re happy to be in your presence. These kids come from backgrounds of negligence, abuse, and poverty; but they’re the most joyful people I’ve ever met.
Church service on Thursday is one of the most fun experiences I’ve had thus far on the race. It was there that I realized how strong of a hold this place had on my heart. We were jumping up and down, and singing along to songs we didn’t know, and dancing with neighbors. We hugged, serenaded one another, and made fools of ourselves. Looking around the room, all I could see was the pure and effortless joy on my teammates faces. And that’s when it hit me. This place has my heart.
Knowing that this is the shortest month of my race, already breaks my heart. Thinking of saying goodbye to such a simple life, filled with such wildly loving people, hurts more than I’m willing to admit. Walking away from life here will mean leaving a piece of me behind. The people, the scenery, the simplicity of it all; my heart has been captivated. It hurts already, knowing my heart will be in so many different places. But it’s okay, because now I’ll understand when people say they have a “favorite country”.
