A Heart’s Cry
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Worship is all of me responding to all of Him
This is a journal entry from Nepal, four days before my laptop was erased. It is a cry to the Father in an effort to describe Him, worship Him, glorify Him, and honor Him. I came across this as I was reading the other day, and God put it on my heart to share it with you.
July 12, 2016
“I won’t give up on this. I will learn how to praise You better by developing the gifts and talents You have given me. I want every word spoken, written, and sung from my mouth to cry Abba, to cry ‘You are worthy.’ You are the only One who has power, majesty, purity, and true beauty. You are the Source of it all. I want every word to cry out to You and attempt to worship a perfect and holy God whose presence would crush me if it weren’t for Your Son. I would be ash in Your presence, but I’m not because of Your perfect plan that has no flaw. Every word should cry out You are King, Creator, Potter, Friend, Father, Counselor, Lover of my soul. You are everything I need and more.
Words can’t say it.
I want my words to magnify You and lift You up while lowering me more and more. I want people to SEE Christ in me, not me! I want my words to attempt to communicate this desire, this dire need, this groaning in my spirit. I just want to magnify You and worship You with everything in me. Everything, My Life EXISTS to glorify You and magnify You. Saying those words doesn’t do it. I want to walk into Your throne room, fall down before You, and worship. You deserve ALL of me and all of my attention. No one else can hold a candle to You.
We are human and our minds just can’t comprehend You, Your glory, Your wonder, Your majesty.
Words are limited. They are like the tip of an ice berg.
They are like a leaf on a tree when the full understanding and description of You would be found in the entire tree.
Words capture Your glory like a single painting can capture every beautiful sunset that has ever graced our horizons everywhere in the world.
Words describe You as well as a picture of a snowy landscape can capture the intricate details and six sides of every snowflake in the picture.
Words can describe You as well as the surface of the ocean reveals all that is in it. It’s just not enough Lord!
I’ve never been so dissatisfied with words! You deserve so much more than I am even capable of giving, but You don’t ask for that. You ask for what I can give. You deserve a several million dollar mansion fully furnished with every known luxury and all I can provide You is one tiny tile, but that is enough for You somehow, knowing that I’m willing to give my single tile.
You deserve a 3D painting the size of the earth, but all I can give You is a painting the size of my hand only painted in 2D and one color of blue, but You don’t care. You still want my silly simple painting.
You deserve the endless worship of everything You created, that ever existed and will ever exist including the rocks and the mountains, but all I can offer You is my single voice that isn’t even that loud. I can’t handle it God. You will never fit in any of my boxes. With one flick of the finger, You destroy my box that is the size of Your pinky nail. There are no words, Lord. I’m in awe of my King and I come before You, humbled. I worship You with the little I have and the little I am, but I give You ALL I have and ALL I am. Fill me with YOU and only YOU and overflow me with YOUR Love.”
