What I learned this month could be summed up in one word: obedience. I came into this month knowing exactly what I wanted to do, exactly how I foresaw my ministry looking. Guess what. God wrecked those plans. I knew exactly what I wanted to do. And God called me to something else. Man, so hard. I can sit here and type the words that I genuinely want to follow God with my whole heart and do/go everywhere he calls me to. And yet sometimes when it happens, it is scary and it is not what we want. I look back at my life and laugh at the amount of times I asked God, ‘tell me where to go, what to do’ and I wonder: how many of those prayers were prayed with a truly open heart. Open to the point that no matter what he said, I would follow. Or did I pray them but have my own plans and wants tucked in the back of my head- the answer that I really wanted God to give. God continuely keept calling me to to give up my plans this month. Give up what I wanted to do, who I wanted to work with, and what ministry looked like in my eyes. God asked me to give up all my wants and to sacrifice in ways that no one else but him would ever see or know about. I fought. I cried. I tried to use human logic to deny all the confirmations God keept sending my way. When I was obedient to God and did what he asked of me, I saw how my one decision to be obedient can affect so many other people. God showed up in huge ways when I did what he asked of me. Through obedience, God revealed much to me about changes to be made in my own heart. I heard from God more clearly and distinctly. I grew closer to God. I learned how being obedient to God sometimes means doing not what we want but what God needs us to so. And that God blesses us through our obedience to him.
God is the God of peace. When I said yes to what he was calling me to, I finally found the peace I was lacking util that point.
This is love for God: to obey his commands. And his commands are not burdensome, for everyone born of God overcomes the world. This is the victory that has overcome the world, even our faith. Who is it that overcomes the world? Only he who believes that Jesus is the Son of God. 1 John 5:3-5
