Matthew 18:21-35
The Parable of the Unmerciful Servant
Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?” Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy times seven times.
“Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. As he began the settlement, a man who owed him ten thousand bags of gold was brought to him.Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt.
“At this the servant fell on his knees before him. ‘Be patient with me,’ he begged, ‘and I will pay back everything.’ The servant’s master took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go.
“But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred silver coins. He grabbed him and began to choke him. ‘Pay back what you owe me!’ he demanded.
“His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay it back.’
“But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt. When the other servants saw what had happened, they were outraged and went and told their master everything that had happened.
“Then the master called the servant in. ‘You wicked servant,’ he said, ‘I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?’ In anger his master handed him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed.
“This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart.”
I was recently thinking about the word forgiveness. In the American, English definition, forgiveness means to stop feeling angry or resentful towards someone… But I have to say, I really don’t think that is what Jesus meant when He told us to forgive the same person 70×7 times when they hurt us.
I don’t think Jesus meant that forgiveness is a feeling because let’s be honest, to actually feel (to stop feeling angry or resentful) like forgiving the same person 490 times is quite literally impossible, we don’t have the stamina or capacity. This was frustrating to me because I can name a few people who have habitually hurt me, or done horrible, unforgivable things that might affect the rest of my life. And if I am being honest, sometimes I don’t want to ever forgive them. I sometimes wonder if I will ever get to a place where I feel ready to forgive them.
Do you ever feel that way?
We talk a lot about how Jesus zipped on humanity so He could save us. He experienced pain, temptation, frustration, anger, sadness, and any other emotion you can name. John 11:35 says that Jesus wept. Do we really think He wasn’t emotionally hurt by the people who habitually betrayed him and broke his trust? Jesus didn’t treat forgiveness as a feeling but instead treated forgiveness as an action, a choice, that He was willing to take on in order to save all of us.
As Christians who have been following Jesus for a number of years we often get caught up in the theological questions and spend our time digging for answers, but when was the last time that you stopped to remember that Jesus died for you?
When was the last time that you sat down and let God into your vulnerability and let Him remind you of just how loved you are? Sometimes we need to re-center ourselves, ground ourselves, to remember not just who we are but whose we are. Jesus died for us because he loves us, not because we can do anything for Him. When Jesus died for us, He chose to forgive billions of people.
Now, I know that Jesus is the ultimate example and it is unreasonable to think we can live a life like His, but I am always striving to look a little more like Him every day. I think Jesus meant forgiveness as a choice. You see, when we actively choose to forgive someone it actually sets us free. The anger, hatred, resentment, and pain we harbor only ultimately affects our hearts. It damages our spirits and keeps us from seeing Jesus work in our lives. It keeps us from loving the people around us, the way we are called to love them.
So, today and every day starting now, I am choosing to forgive those who hurt me. I am choosing to forgive those who hurt my family and the people I love. I am going to stop letting the enemy decide the fate of my heart and start letting Jesus do the work that needs to be done. I hope that you will join me because, honestly, if we wait to forgive others until we feel like forgiving them, we are going to be waiting around forever.
