THE STRENGTH OF IMPERFECTION
“Be perfect as your Father is perfect.” -Matthew 5:48
I used to like that verse. As someone whose main desire in life has been to grow into the person God made me to be, I loved a verse that called me to perfection, for it meant there was always so much more room for improvement.
But the enemy is perfect at taking our good intentions, twisting them back at us, and aiming them at our worst weaknesses.
My drive to perfectionism propelled me to accomplish much in life. I graduated with a perfect 4.0 with three degrees in five years. I received national awards for character. I won championships and achieved the impossible in my sport. And for a lot of my life, I did it without one hint of doubt that things weren’t happening the way they should. People should reap what they sow.
I believed that my work ethic constituted my character. I believed my strength comprised my attractiveness.
That’s what our world tells us, right? Work ethic is what looks good on your resume, what gets you into the school you want, and what makes you attractive to friends and coworkers and bosses and future spouses. People want perfection. They want drive. They want results.
The problem is outside of a perfect lamb on a bloody cross, perfectionism doesn’t exist.
On the Race, a lot of my journey has been learning exactly that. I’ve learned I am the furthest thing from perfect, no matter what my resume looks like. I’ve learned that it’s okay to have reasons for shortcomings, rather than just labeling them as excuses and wondering why I’m stressed. I’ve learned that even if you switch the Spanish words for hair and skin in the middle of translating your teammate’s testimony, the audience laughs and life goes on.
I’ve learned that there are some people on this earth who will love you because of your imperfection, rather than in spite of it.
I’m sad to say I don’t think I’ll be getting any more perfect as life goes on. But thank goodness for a God who was willing to be perfection for me. Thank God (literally) that He was willing to sacrifice all of his perfection for all of my imperfection. And thank God He is risen indeed!!
When Jesus rose from that grave, the victory was sealed. His perfection replaced my attempts at glory. Yet my whole life I’ve tried to live as if I could somehow merit dying on my own cross.
As we approach Easter, I feel like it is the perfect time to tell you: I’m not perfect. I never will be perfect. And from now on, I’m asking God to help me see that as beautiful, to see His sacrifice as worthy, and to live in the freedom and the strength of imperfection.
I hope you perfectionists out there will join me in doing the same.
MINISTRY
While we’ve been in the same place for five weeks now, you all might not know what a typical day in our lives looks like. The day I wrote most of this blog I wrote down what I did all day. I hope this gives you a glimpse of what being a missionary looks like for us right now.
- 7:30am: Woke up, ate breakfast, got ready
- Went to the school and taught English class
- Ran, did yoga, showered
- Went on a grocery store run
- Caught up on phone messages, business things
- Ate lunch
- Had team feedback
- We lesson planned for the next school and ministry days
- Emily and I painted the church for two hours
- My shoes still permanently reeked from Mojos, so I spent about twenty minutes scrubbing them out in the shower
- I hand washed my laundry and hung it up outside to dry
- Finally had a quiet time and journaled
- I worked on my book proposal and called my credit card company
- Kaitlyn and I cooked dinner
- Ate Dinner
- The team listened to a Steven Furtick sermon
- 10pm: Bedtime
Being a missionary can look differently for us each day on the Race. In Chile, sometimes it looks like letting a little girl paint a butterfly on your face.
Sometimes it looks like painting the outside of a church.
Sometimes it looks like going to the beach with your host and his son and looking at the sea lions.
Sometimes it looks like letting your teammate read you a bedtime story.
Sometimes it looks like spending the night at a family’s house to spend time with them.
Sometimes it looks like blowing bubbles.
Sometimes it looks like talking about what you’ve learned as a missionary with future missionaries.
Sometimes it looks like spending hours lesson planning so you can teach children Bible studies, music, and English.
Sometimes it looks like dragging palm branches back from the plaza so you can use them in a Palm Sunday drama.
Sometimes it looks like making lemonade and playing soccer.
Sometimes it looks like letting your Chilean dad spoil you rotten at a soccer game.
Sometimes it looks like teaching kids how to throw rocks at Goliath.
Sometimes it looks like letting your teammate wake you up because she needs prayer.
Sometimes it looks like painting a mural in your house.
Sometimes it looks like cleaning the bathroom all six of you use or washing everyone’s dishes after dinner.
Sometimes it looks like picking grapes at a wine festival and sharing your testimony with a guy on the tractor on the way back to town.
Sometimes it looks like dancing with a stray dog in the park.
Sometimes it looks like dancing with a local in front of a festival and people realizing Christians can have fun, too.
Sometimes it looks like teammates running outside to help you right after you fall off a ladder.
Sometimes it looks like teaching in a public school system.
Sometimes it looks like having a prayer night for your squad and the world.
Sometimes it looks like preaching and leading worship.
Always it looks like loving Jesus, loving others, and learning to love ourselves.
We have done all of these things and more this week, and every one of them makes up part of what it means for us to be missionaries.
PRAYER REQUESTS AND UPDATES
- After almost six weeks in the same place, my team and I have almost finished our time here in Chile. We will celebrate Easter here and then head to Patagonia on the 17 of April. We get a few days to explore Patagonia before debrief starts, so a few squadmates and I are hiking the W Trail! Please pray that each of our teams finishes strong, fosters the friendships and connections we have here, and are able to stay safe and have fun in Patagonia.
- After our hiking adventure, we will have another debrief in Patagonia where our coaches, mentors, and other staff come out to encourage us. Both our original squad leaders, Destiny and Jeremy, are coming back for debrief! Please pray for travel safety for everyone and that we all leave debrief refreshed and rejuvenated to start the final leg of our World Race journey.
- We are no longer going to Paraguay. The visas were too expensive and because it was an expedition country, we just don’t have the finances to make that a feasible reality. After debrief in Patagonia, we are headed to Argentina for about a month to do another ministry with host contacts. After that, we will head to Uruguay for a little bit to do some expedition work, and then we will finish our journey in Rio de Janeiro for a final debrief before we fly back to the US.
- I fell off a ladder painting the church the other day. It was stupid, and it shook me up quite a bit. I made it out with only a sprained hand and wrist, some sore spots, and a beat up leg. Many people would’ve broken their leg or even died from such an accident. Praise God He protected me, and I take that as a sign I have more to do on the World Race and more to do in the world! As always, please continue to pray for the healing of our bodies and the safety of all our teams.
- Most World Racers say months 8 and 9 are some of the hardest months of the Race. The excitement of the travel wears off, you’ve been doing ministry for eight months, and you’re just tired. Home is close enough you can see it, but still far enough away that you can’t really live for that reality yet. Please pray we stay present, continue to fight for each other, and that we don’t take any moment of this crazy adventure for granted. God still has plans to work in us and through us on the rest of this trip, and we want to finish well!
- I have been making fewer videos lately. This is because I devote more time to team leading and to working on my book proposal. God has called me to writing, not making videos. That being said, there will be some videos to come soon. For now though, please check out my teammate Tiara’s videos. God has called her to this ministry, and she will be pursuing the stewardship of this gift after the Race. Her videos move people to tears, so please watch some of what we’ve been doing through her lens. There is also a video about my teammate Corrie and what she is doing after the Race. Please watch and consider joining her in her journey to stay in Bolivia after the Race. Please pray for Tiara, Corrie, and the rest of us as we step into the dreams and gifts God has given us to impact the Kingdom both on the Race and beyond!
Thank you for your constant support and prayers. I still need you all as much now as I did at the beginning of this journey! I know I may seem removed from you all, but you are still in my hearts and I am looking forward to reconnecting with everyone when I get home. Time is flying, and I’ll be back stateside before you know it!
God bless you for reading this and please let me know if there is any way I can be praying for you.
Tera
