Hey God, I just wanted to let you know that I surrender my life to you…again…
I feel like I am constantly praying this prayer.
I desire for the Lord to have control of my life. I know His plan is greater than my own, without question I know this is true. I trust Him. He is all knowing. He is my Father and protector. He is the only one who will never fail me. Yet I allow myself to be sucked into the enemy’s trap daily. I forget that I am completely dependent. I convince myself that control is good, that my plan is perfect, that I know what is best. I have been stuck in the cycle of folly. Thinking that my earthly wisdom is actual wisdom. I will let you in on a little secret it is not. Wisdom only comes from the Father.
To be wise I must fear the Lord (Proverbs9:10), be humble, selfless, surrendered, allow the Holy Spirit to dwell in me, read God’s living word, and choose daily to know Him intimately.
Living in folly roadblocks us from allowing Christ into our lives to let these things happen, in fact it completely removes the realization we need these things. Currently I am reading Steadfast Love, by Lauren Chandler (this book is great, highly recommend, READ IT). She talks about these two kinds of wisdom, one real and one false, and it really shook me up and made me realize that I am NOTHING without the Lord.
RANDOM things that have really been on my heart and I feel compelled to share:
1. Our world is incredibly broken and the hate and violence that is occurring has shaken me to my core. I am a fixer and I look for solutions. I look at situations and try to figure out what can be done, what can I do. Here is the problem, I cannot do anything on my own to fix or solve this. I truly believe that nothing can fix this brokenness except for the Gospel. That God is the only solution. In Acts10 Peter was up on the roof praying to the Lord and the Lord showed Him a vision, then in verse 15 the voice spoke again, “Do not call something unclean if God has made it clean.” Then Cornelius’s men arrive at Simon’s house looking for Peter. Peter knows he is to go with them so he goes. When Peter arrives at Cornelius’s home the following conversations happens. Peter (a Jewish man), says to Cornelius (a Gentile), “You know it is against our laws for a Jewish man to enter a Gentile home like this or to associate with you. But God has shown me that I should no longer think of anyone as impure or unclean. So I came without objection as soon as I was sent for. Now tell me why you sent for me.” Point being as I read this a couple days ago I just was overwhelmed with this truth that our country seems so oblivious to. The Lord is saying anything I have made is pure. No one is excused from this. We are all God’s children. Therefore, we are all equal. We are all living in sin, and all our sin is equal. Jesus didn’t die on the cross to wipe away some people’s sins (the ones we see as “not as bad”). NO, NO, NO! Jesus died a painful, undeserving death to bear the weight of ALL of EVERYONE’S sins.
2. Living in America is a blessing and a curse. These last couple weeks my eyes have really been opened to the sin of idolatry (I think this is because this is something I also struggle with, basically I was ignoring it). BUT SERIOUSLY PEOPLE! We have got to realize that we can only have ONE God, and many of us, myself included, at times have more than one. Living in a developed country we depend and are very selfish with our money. Newsflash, it is not ours! One more time, it is NOT ours. It is God’s. If we want to grow nearer to true wisdom and nearer to the Lord we must loosen our grip on this idol. We need to be generous and allow God to use us to further His Kingdom.
3. I am selfish. I am prideful. I am stubborn. Not great traits I know. However, I would argue that a lot of us possess these less than ideal traits. We need to give this to God and allow Him to create in us a new heart of flesh (Ezekiel36:26). Things I need to work on and want to be held accountable to. Putting others before myself. Giving the glory to the Lord, always. Being slow to speak (James1:19).
4. We were created for relationships with people. That being said, community is powerful. Be aware of who you surround yourself with.
5. Where we are is our mission field. Yes, God may have called me to go and share the gospel around the world for a year, but that is not the only place we can and should share our faith. There are people who don’t know Christ at all ends of the Earth including our own communities. God has each of us where we are for a purpose, be a light wherever you are.
Love,
Teags
PS. Shirts are here! WOOHOO! Thank you all so much for supporting me, more updates on that to come. Also thank you for reading my rando blog post! These are all things that have been heavy on my heart, so thank you for reading. I am also only $2,442 away from fully funded!!!!!!!!!! Thank you so much to all my supporters so far! If you feel led to give, I would be so grateful and you can do so on my blog!
