Jesus was called into the wilderness. To be away and disconnect, to seek the Lord and be obedient amidst sin and temptation. For 40 days he relied entirely on the Lord to provide and give him strength.
I was walking and talking with a teammate of mine, mid September, working through brokenness, identity and surrender. We agreed that life back home can be distracting (not necessarily in a bad way) and can fill our thoughts and take away from the space and openness we allow for the Lord to speak to us. We decided in that moment that a month unplugged searching and listening to the Father would be challenging, powerful and a choice of obedience. The call was set before us; we had the choice. What would it be- God or comfort in people back home? I felt the nudge in my spirit, “Am I enough, Teagan? Will you choose me? Do you trust me in this?”
“Go out in the woods, go out. If you don’t go out in the woods nothing will ever happen and your life will never begin.” ? Clarissa Pinkola Estes
I am choosing to be obedient in this call to the wilderness. For me, wilderness will look like not communicating with those back home and staying off wifi for the month of October while I am in Nepal. Instead, I will spend my month in deep searching and relationship with the Lord. Finding my identity, strength, comfort, joy, affirmation and love in Him alone. Intimately and tangibly growing in a heart and head knowledge that the Lord, my Creator and Father, is sufficient and all I need.
I have no idea what this will look like. I have no idea what the Father is going to lay on my heart or walk me through. This is all one big risk, a leap of faith that I feel a lot of anxiousness in taking. The Spirit keeps whispering to be though, “Am I enough, sweet daughter? Would I lead you astray? Don’t you know that my plan is perfect and my Will for you is greater than you could imagine? Trust me, hold my hand and let’s go for a walk through the wilderness.”
The wilderness is a place where the people of God are shaped by God, through suffering and discipline, mercy and grace. It is where our Father dwells with and leads His people, and as a result we learn to follow.
This month is going to be full of emotion, vulnerability, trial and goodness. I am asking that you join me in this prayer this month.
Father,
Thank you for choosing me. Thank you for knowing me fully in all my brokenness and choosing me. You don’t make me clean myself up first, but you take me as I was and am and love me deeply, each day. Lord, you are great and your light shines brightly in my life. Lord, I pray that I would never turn from that light. Lord, I thank you for the comfort and support I have back home. I pray your hand of protection and peace over them. I pray you bless them greatly and that they would choose you day in and day out. Lord, that they would see themselves the way you see them. Lord, I pray that they would know your love for them. And know that no matter what that love is unchanging. Lord, I pray over this walk I am going on with you, Father. Lord, I pray that my heart would trust you. I pray that my obedience would be true and unwavering. Father, your plan is perfect, and I pray that in that truth my anxiousness would be gone. Lord, in the authority you have given me in your Son Jesus I pray that any fear the enemy is putting in me would be gone and I would fear no more. Trusting completely in the surrender and splendor of you. Father, I pray that my heart would be open for the work you will do. I pray that my ears would be open to hear your voice in every minute of every day. Lord, I pray that my eyes would see what you see and my heart would break for what breaks yours. Father, I pray that I would see and know you as my Father. That I would find comfort in you and depend on you. That my relationship with you would grow and my seeking of you would be intentional. That it would be two way. Lord, give me ears to listen and remove distractions. Fix my thoughts on you. Father, you are creator of all. Your beauty radiates all around me. Your promises are true. You perform healings and miracles each and every day. You are present. You are here. You have not abandoned us; you seek us. Lord, I pray that we would in return seek you boldly and passionately. Lord, that we would worship and praise you for all that you are. That all glory would be to you. Father, I love you. In Jesus’ name I pray this prayer. Amen.
P.S. I will still be writing blogs and posting them throughout the month, and possibly pictures on Instagram and Facebook as well (not sure about this one yet).
P.P.S. Since I will not be communicating with those back home during the month of October I wanted to wish a VERY VERY HAPPY BIRTHDAY to:
Kelly I hope that the 6th is filled with absolute joy and blessings. I pray for this upcoming year of your life and the things God will show you. I also have a couple stories of roses for you. I will work on typing those up to send to you in November! Love you so very much.
Shelby I hope the 11th is a day of celebration of how the Lord has used you in this last year and excitement for what is to come. I am so thankful for our friendship and the encouragement you give me. You are beautiful and I hope you feel so loved on your bday!!! Love you!
Shelby Spenner!!! It’s your birthday month!!!! I hope the 14th is absolutely incredible! I miss you tons and hope you are doing well! I am praying for you and praying that your birthday is full of blessings!
EmJess! I miss you so much! You have such a contagious joy for life in you. I pray that your birthday this year would bring so many blessings and fill your head and heart with dreams and callings on your life. Follow those callings and chase the story the Lord will give you. Love you, and hope the 17th is truly special!
Hanny!!!!!!! I really, really hope I am with you on this day! That’s all, because it is happening! I love you! God has used you very strategically in my life and I am so thankful for His weaving of lives together. You are a beautiful example of a daughter of our King. I pray so many blessings over you and that you would feel so loved in your journey with the Father and that you would feel celebrated and beautiful on the 19th! Happy Birthday!
Carly, my sweet Carly! You hold such a special place in my heart, and I love your passionate pursuit of the Lord. It is powerful and you are a witness to many. You choice into the Father’s truth and goodness in trials and brokenness is an encouragement to myself and many others. You have a beautiful heart and the Lord is moving in your life. I think so often of how your obedience to the Lord is a force to be reckoned with. I thank the Lord for the opportunity to know you and do life with you. I can’t wait to see the good works the Lord will do through you. You are a vessel and if you allow Him, He will use you in big ways. I pray that your birthday would be a day celebrating the truths the Lord has spoken over you and into you! He loves you so much. Lord I pray that the 23rd would be a day Carly would feel your presence in a very real way. Lord bless her and show her how much you love her as your chosen daughter. Love you Carly!
Lisa you are beautiful and your heart is beautiful! I hope the 23rd is an incredible day for you! I pray that you would feel so loved by our Father. That you would see and hear the Lord’s call on your life in this next year. I pray that He would show you His goodness and love in this upcoming year of your life. Love you!!!
P.P.P.S. I promise this is the last “ps”. Luke and Preethy! This is a month that will forever change your lives. I wish I could be there to celebrate your becoming one with God on the 21st. The Lord has designed marriage for so much good and to glorify Himself. I am so thankful for the orchestration of His Will and that He has brought you two to each other. I know that this month will probably come with some stress, but don’t worry. Everything will be beautiful. The 21st is your day to celebrate your love for one another and your obedience to follow the call of the Lord to best glorify Him together. You two are choosing into commitment to each other, but first and foremost with God, and I will be praying over you two for this journey. The Lord has great plans for you two! Love you both so much and I wish you the most joyful and beautiful day of celebration and commitment!
