Coffee stains, iced knees and torn Bibles are great representatives of this journey!
Every coffee stain will remind you of the countless 1 on 1’s, coffee dates, late night wake up calls, all night prayer and worship events, early morning adventures, dance parties in the kitchen, cold Ethiopian mornings/nights, cute coffee shops, spontaneous gifts and rainy Costa Rican days.
An iced knee will always remind you that every ounce of the pain was worth it. Every trial, hard conversation, lack of sleep, hard feedback, reminder, announcement and monotonously enforced rule was worth it. Every second you had to spare, tear, moment of vulnerability, piece of your story shared, and drop of wisdom you had to give away was worth it. Every adventure day, moment of intentionality and quality time was worth it.
Your worn and torn Bible will always remind you of where you are rooted. In the midst of the storm, tears and rain wrinkling the pages. Coffee staining the edges as you share a cup of coffee with your Father. In the middle of traveling, pages getting folded and crinkled. On the most beautiful and fun days, pages getting sun kissed and sandy. Every page that is holding on by a thread is a reminder of who holds you on your best and worst days.
This journey is not an easy one but it’s one that is worth it. It’s not safe but it’s good. It’s not your identity but through it you will learn more of your identity. It is not end-all be-all but at the end I will be in all.
You will learn many things along the way, but they will all point back to one thing. It’s about who you are, not what you do. It’s Me living inside of you and being poured out on everyone around you as a result of our intimacy and relationship. You could lead a million mission trips, start countless ministries, lead tons of people to salvation, save all the orphans, widows and prostitutes and it will still NEVER be about what you did. I would accomplish all of that without you. You don’t have to strive, working to always get things rights, doing things because you think you need to or are suppose to. You don’t need to DO anything besides live in intimacy with me, say yes and be you. I do the rest so that you can rest.
People will leave, fail and be disobedient. Be quick to listen, slow to anger and full of love and grace.
People will succeed, be victorious and make you proud. Be quick to celebrate, slow in allowing a moment to pass and full of love and grace.
There will be long days you wished were shorter and short days that you wished were longer. Embrace each moment as something to be cherished for it’s time and then let go.
No matter how hard a day may be, at the end you will look back and remember all the good days with tears of joy.
The lack of good pens you will have are evidence that this journey is one for the books.
Every unnecessarily long hug filled with tears is evidence that the relationships formed were real and worth it.
At the end, if you were to sum up all of squad leading in one phrase, you would say
WORTH IT.
