Since training camp I have been trying to come up with a blog to post. Adventures in Missions encourages one post a week… So far I am at one post a month. With that being said, I have been comparing my life now to the life I will be living on the race. The stories happening to me in Oklahoma are nothing close to the impacting stories and lives of the people across the world, how on earth can I get a good story here.
A week ago I came home from spending Thanksgiving in Indiana. I knew of the damage and power outages going on in and near my town due to the heavy ice storm that swept through the central Plains Oklahoma. For some of you out of staters, an ice storm is when freezing rain falls from the sky with below freezing temperatures. We had about 1 to 1 1/2 inches of ice covering cars, outdoor Christmas decorations and trees. Here in Oklahoma we lack the mass quantity of trees, but the trees we do have caused a massive amount of damage to our homes and our power lines.
My family as well as over 70,000 other Okies where left in the dark for days. There was over 500 out of state trucks working on getting the power back on. A HUGE thank you to the men who left the comforts of their home and their days off to help Oklahoma.
As I returned Sunday from Indiana I came home to a house with power, until later that night it went off again. I woke up Monday (my day off as a hairstylist) wondering what in the world I would do that day. I did not want to go anywhere because it was cold. I had light from the sun but no wifi. I had a suitcase full of dirty clothes but no working washer and dryer. I could not even make my routine eggs and toast. And I totally did not have a TV to watch and I could have used my phone or I pad and use data to watch LOST but I would have ran down my battery.
Since Training camp I have felt numb, slightly depressed, and struggling with the pain of waiting to leave for my trip. I did not once open my Bible and hear the word of God. I wrote in my Journal one time in the past month or so. Every thing from training camp was in a misty place. The enemy has shown itself. The fear, trust, shame, and guit I had overcomed at camp was slipping back through my fingers. Ive been treating my body unhealthy with lack of exercise and emotional eating knowing I will soon not have the foods from home on the race. On my way to my Grandparents I felt the Lord in the Plane. I had the feeling he was pushing that it was time to do some work.
The Lord has blessed me with not needing to fund raise for my whole trip cost. It is from something that has been put together since I was born and made to use for my future. (Galatians1:15//Jeremiah1:5) I agreed to fund raise a little because plane tickets to and from TC and to launch were out of my budget, as well as shots and purchasing gear, plus I will not have an income for eleven months.
That Monday with no power, no plans and no episodes of LOST I went to the Lord. I sat in my chair and talked to God. I told him “Today Lord I follow you, I give this day to you and to your direction. What you say I will do. Where you go I will go. Speak to me so I can follow your obedience”. Fundraising was constantly in my heart. I opened my bible and found myself in the book of Luke.
“But the one who hears and does not do them is like a man who built a house on the ground without a foundation.” 6:49
“Take care then how you hear, for to the one who has, more will be given, and from the one who has not, even what he thinks that he has will be taken away.” 8:18
God is obviously telling me to listen, and LISTEN WELL.
As I soon realize, the Lord wants me to work on other things but on that day it was fundraising. Even if it is for small donations, the money isn’t the reason. The reason is to act in a way of generosity. To give those who want to give an opportunity to give towards the Kingdom. He wanted to use me and the act of fundraising as a tool to reach those within my social group of people. I am not one to post a lot on social media about my life, or my trip. I get annoyed with those who post their whole life story and what type of chips they ate for lunch. I hold back because I have been afraid of not being accepted by others, being afraid of being that girl who post to much. I fear what I do post will sound stupid or not make sense, have a misspelled word or be the victim of incorrect grammar. Lets be real, we all have our moments. Ive grown to become really hard on myself, not just with social media post but as well as body image and acceptance with myself. That’s something I’ve grown in but yet still working on.
I knew for a long time the minute I would sit with God and open my bible this would happen, that is why I have held off this long since training camp. At first I was afraid to trust God in fulfilling his promise if I posted something on facebook. I had to be broken a little, I had to see its not about me, or my facebook status, its about giving glory to the King. I needed this Ice storm to bring me back to the Lord, when I had nothing to occupy my time. The Lord is always looking after us, the Holy Spirit is constantly among us, but if we are not constantly engaging in the Spirit there is no room for God to move. We have to listen to the Spirit to hear Gods voice, to see his direction. We must keep Faith that God can and he will do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine. Ephesians3:20
The next day on Giving Tuesday(thank you Lord for that)I posted on FB. I was nervous, excited and anxious to see what will come of the post. Not even three hours later I had two $500 donations in my account. Glory to God. Thank you to those whose hearts were touched by the Spirit. Thank you for your generous donation. Praise you Lord.
Even though the trees have been broken by the ice they have also been pruned, they will find strength through the brokenness. I am thankful for the ice storm. The ice storm helped my relationship with the Lord to grow in a different way than ever before. Whenever difficulties come, go to the Lord, you never know what he has to show you. Follow his obedience and you will see his beautiful outcome. I needed the power to go out to fully depend on God. The power out helped me learn how to seek him more in ways I never thought of. We all need to be broken a little bit. How will you let if affect you? You can hide from it or grow from it.
If you were wondering our power came back on Wednesday afternoon after a simple fuse was put back together. Now I’m nice and warm and back in my comfort zone (for now). I’m ready to rely on God whether comfortable or in need. I’m so Thankful for the Lord and his revelations. Whether big or small I will thrive on leaning on him. His will always prevails.
