“In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and
trust is your strength…” Isiah 31:15
Before my departure, a man I consider my one of my brothers
told me something. He told me to
go slow, that this would be a season of finding my Fathers voice. He went on to share, “God will give you
eyes.” Not sure the depth of that
to date, but I do know God used Him to speak to me. Through the past two weeks quietness and rest have been
heavy on my heart.
As God continued to plant that in my heart, He brought us to
our ministry, Hija Quieta. This is no coincidence, as the English translation
is “daughter be still.” Then Chad
and Rocio both brought the above scripture to my attention two separate times,
only to follow with many more.
There is a piece of me that is quiet and a piece of my that
is ready to run, but I believe that for right now I must learn how to rest in
our Lord. He wants to speak to me
in many ways, I can feel it. He
wants to reveal the depths of His heart and His will to me.
It is my very nature to take careful note of every situation
before diving in, so why wouldn’t the One who designed me that way want me to
do the same with our relationship?
My current surroundings come with lots of baggage, people in my space,
constant schedule updates and debates, and brokenness and joy in the same
moment. I must learn how to hear
my Fathers leading amongst so much chaos. As one of my friends put it, “If you
can see the unseen you can handle the seen.” If I can know my God in the trials and the unpredictable
changes, how much more will I know Him in everything.
So today I say, yes it is OK to rest! At first I had a hard time with this
question. I felt I had to be a
good steward of the money my amazing supporters gave and continue to give to
this mission. I thought, I have to
be going, going, going for 11 months, they invested in my to help others around
the world. But when I truly
thought of being a good steward, rest hit me hard. If I am not being led by God 100%, hearing from Him, and
doing what He lays so plainly before me, how could I possibly be a good steward
of that support…I couldn’t.
Although rest has many different reflections, it still
remains the same at the root. I
have been laid out for two days now, I believe it’s God allowing this because I
need to rest. I have been going,
going, going and I need rest for a moment. It really is funny, the moment I start to feel better and
get up to move around, I am forced back to rest by my pain and discomfort. I
guess it takes a lot to get through my thick skull…lol. This rest thing is hard, but I am
learning.
In the midst of team unrest, sickness and change I praise
God. I know He is working, I know
I must seek God for answers and not my flesh. On the tail end of two weeks and the very start of 11 months
I am beginning to see just a glimpse into what God has for not only so many
others, but me too. TODAY I WILL
REST AND BE STILL IN MY GOD!!!
Thank you to all my supporters, prayer warriors, family and
friends. Thank you for bearing
with me through this process, the good bad and the ugly. Love you all!
