Father God,
I love you so much, you are so good. You are everything to me. you provide the way and go before me always have always will. You are the only one that knows what is going to happen and when. Your the only one I need to impress or draw love from. You are everything I need. Jesus I know that you care more about me then I do. You hate to see my broken heart over and over again but are dedicated so much to my heart to continue to make it whole, and God I know that the only way it can be made completely whole is through this brokenness that comes from heart ache. Father thank you for the huge calling on my life, please forgive me when I question what you are doing God because I know that YOU ARE GOOD.. YOU ARE ALWAYS GOOD. Please remind me about your heart that you have showed me so many times. You are faithful, you are love, you never bring me through anything alone, you never bring me through devastation without 100 fold blessing on the other side. Help me to rest in that God, help me to rest in your plan and not mine Father.
Its hard to understand the last year of my life, the dedication I had to following you and your plan to have it so abruptly changed. God I trust you, I know in time when I am ready you will tell me why you have done this. What keeps going through my mind is that I was doing the world race to follow you I was doing it to become closer to you. That will always be my goal nothing will stray me from that path. Whatever it is you are asking me to do I will do, so if that means not doing the world race, ok Lord the purpose is always to follow you so if that isn’t what you are asking of me then I will do whatever else that is. Even if its a lot smaller in my eyes I know it is big in yours and at the center of your heart where I am.
Father I will get through this but I need you, I need you to show me how to let you closer. How to bring you into my hurt to heal it. How to let go, God I cant do it without you please remind me that it isn’t about me and my huge plans to follow you. Its about you, and your plans for the kingdom. Father I am blessed in any possible way you have chosen to use me for your work. I am yours and I will follow you to the ends of whatever you ask of me you just have to make it clear what you want and I am there. I love you Jesus, thank you for saving my life in every way, I will never forget it. Stay close…. In Jesus name.. Amen
I will be ok everyone. God has my back, always has and always will. His plans for me are big, or He wouldn’t have battled so hard to get me. That is how you know I will be ok.
Jeremiah 29:11 For I know that plans I have for you declares the Lord, Plans to prosper you and not harm you plans to give you a hope and a future.
That how I know it will all work out, the bible promises that I will.
No it wasn’t my choice to not go on the world race, it is my choice to follow Gods will and trust His promises.
My mission trips will look a lot different now, I will now be doing short term missions and to be honest I have no idea what the future looks like all I know is that I will serve the Lord in whatever way that looks like.
Please keep me in your prayers and if you have questions, comments, or concerns you may contact me or the world race organization (adventures in missions)
For those of you concerned about the money raised, it looks like I will be trying to use it on multiple short term missions. More info coming on that soon.
In closing thank you everyone who has supported me in so many ways with prayers money love and kindness. I couldn’t have done any of this without you. I also want to encourage you that even though it might sting a little when you think of the money going somewhere else like it did me for awhile. Do we trust God with every part of us? Does He know what he is doing? I say yes and I (try to) rest in that. I love you all and I pray that God blesses you 100 fold of how you have blessed me. <3
