Training camp……the hardest week I’ve ever experienced, but the most rewarding/life changing week of my life.
They told us that we could try to explain the things that happened over the course of the week; the challenges, the heartaches, the trials, the moving of God, the spiritual healing, the overwhelming sense of God’s love, etc but that those who did not experience it would have a harder time understanding the full affects of the week, than those who were able to experience it and so far I believe that to be true. Not to mention how hard it is to try to fully explain. I was try to do my best though.
Challenges and changes:
- First off… a week without coffee or hot beverages of any sort…. THE WORST. I wish I would have known that I was going to go through caffeine withdrawal; I would have mentally prepared myself for the headache. This was the easiest of our challenges, but by far the most disliked by some of us. We were never thirsty though…always having something to drink available.
- We had our bags taken away and lacked access to them numerous times, which was hard because everything that we determined to be “ours” for the week was in them and to lose all that is yours is a challenge. There were a couple days when we had 3 minutes, and I mean literally 3 minutes to grab what we thought we needed or what we could fit into our day packs for the next 40 hours. We sometimes had not sleeping bag or clean clothes or toothbrush. The lack of things we needed was hard initially. But God filled the sense of loss with his presence and gifts. He provided all the things that we needed and enlightened us to the things we thought we need but actually didn’t.
- We were cold; I mean…It was in the 40’s and down pouring most of the week, in addition to a couple tornado warnings. God again filled us with his warmth, in addition to giving us each other to warm. I never realized the power of body heat and lying next to someone to keep warm. If it hadn’t been for some of my wonderful teammates I’d have probably frozen. But God was gracious and kept us warm. He provided us with dry clothing when all our clothes were wet, he provided us with a dry building when it was too much to be outside in. Although we were grumpy in our cold states, our needs were always met.
- The American comfort of food was taken from us. Not only did we have to eat things we were unfamiliar with, we got small portions. “Community eating” they told us….ugh, what? My thoughts included…”I have to do what with my fingers?”…”I get how much?”…”You’re kidding right?”…When was the last time we actually got to WASH our hands?” and “Wasn’t that person literally just in the port-a-potty?” Yes, community eating. A life style, a habit and a normal thing for people who don’t live lives of luxury. It was a hard thing, but an amazing lesson to learn. By the end of the week my thoughts had completely changed; focusing more on making sure everyone got some and no longer being focused on me. Sharing a single plate of food with 7 other people when we can only use our hands and needed to be feed everyone will change how you feel about sharing and caring. They say eating with people is an intimate act; an act of trust and friendship….try eating with them community style and see how much more that statement fits.
- Bucket showers. Need I say more? There was a day, the morning before I arrived at camp to be precise, where I NEEDED to shower and make sure I looked appropriate to be out of my house. I have never been someone focused on fashion or make up, but I have always been someone set on being clean and feeling clean and feeling comfortable with my presentation. That comfort and set way of life was ripped from me real quick. I can’t imagine how the people who ARE fashion oriented, or desire make up daily felt. The challenged lied not in whether you could take a bucket shower or not, but the challenged lied in whether the bucket shower was enough for you or not. We learned quickly to make it enough. The wonderful thing about losing this security; the security of knowing you look alright, is that we were fully, 1000% accepted by each other in our “not looking alright”ness. God filled these insecurities with his reminders to us that he loves us as we are and that we are beautiful to him no matter what kind of shower we’ve taken or how much makeup we have on.
- Technology loss! Ugh oh….. oh no, RUN! This for some people was the hardest part of the week. My phone died on the airplane and remained dead till Friday night, 7 whole days of silence. I did not have a problem with it; but I despise technology. I use my phone to text and for work purposes mostly. I enjoy calling rather than texting…but I am someone who does have a phone so I do fall victim to the technology addiction like so many others. My distain helps me run easily from it though, when I can. So, a week without a phone was great for me. I loved it. I did not enjoy the lack of person time though, so when I was able to charge my phone on Friday I spent an hour in my tent before bed listening to music and recharging from the week. It was a blessing. I did struggle without music and some “personal recharge” time, so technology being taken did affect me. In the absence of music, texting, calling, Facebook and emails God was able to speak to me. I was able to spend time with the people around me and formed some beautiful relationships. God reminded us that the relationship we need to focus most on is with him and then those relationships in front of us, not those behind the screens of technology.
Training week changed me. God took who I thought I was and made me into who he wants me to be, or at least the start there of. I came into contact with people who accepted me without hesitation, even when my insecurities and sins were exposed. I was loved and I was encouraged. I cried with people I had never met before and I laughed at things I never used to think were funny. God was present and he overwhelmed us with his love and acceptance. The Holy Spirit spoke to some people and healed others; things I thought only happened in the time of the disciples. I was changed. I was loved. I was forgiven and I was healed.
The hardest week of my life and I came out more alive and strong than I though possible. Thank you training camp….. I cannot wait to see what God has in store for the next year. I do pray that it includes coffee though.
Thanks for reading,
Tabbi
