When deciding to go on the race, I had no idea how it would affect my family and friends. I knew that good would come out of this decision, but to get to the good you also sometimes have to go through the not so good – Not just the uncertainty, and doubts formed in your own mind, but also the inquiries from loved ones who might not understand the adamancy to follow a call and leave all things comfortable for 11 months. When I told my parents that I was accepted to go on the race, they were supportive, but as you will see in the story below, they were blistered with worry. I prayed that God would comfort them and help them see the place I was coming from. He answered my prayer the day my mom told me to “go throw your stone”. My mom sent me an email today with the story below, which is my answered prayer in her own words. As an English teacher, she said that it felt good to write it out and I’m so glad she did. Of course I cried reading it and wanted to share. God is so good.
“I work out almost every day to music on my iPod nano. But on August 17, 2015 my iPod somehow lost its battery life and I had to watch TV while running my four miles. The channel happened to be on NBC and Kathie Lee Gifford had just returned from laying her husband, Frank Gifford to rest. I listened as she shared their faith in God and how that faith informed how they lived. She explained that their trip a few years ago to the Valley of Elah, where they picked up some of the stones like the one David threw to defeat Goliath, changed him. 1 Samuel 17:1-25 And she urged those who were watching to continue to carry out Frank’s message.
“Frank would want you to do this today: If you see a stone somewhere, pick it up and ask yourself, ‘What is my stone? What is the gift that only I can do in this world to make it a better place?’ And spend your life trying to throw it well,” Kathie Lee said. She explained that this is how she encouraged her children with their life choices… “Go throw your stone.”
Little did Kathie Lee know, but her tribute to her late husband was the encouragement I needed to deal with my daughter’s decision to apply to The World Race, an organization that sends missionaries to eleven different countries over eleven months. When she told me of her decision to apply for this mission trip, I was skeptical, mystified and increasingly terrified. She had finished college, moved to a big city, had a good job and was paving her way as a twenty something millennial. But something happened that changed her trajectory, I don’t know what it was but it had her on her knees seeking God’s will in her life.
Like any mother, I googled, read and fretted over her decision. I discovered both negative and positive reviews on the organization. I worried about her health and safety while in 3rd world countries. I lost sleep over how I could possibly go for eleven months without seeing her. That was me up until my workout of August 17.
This was her stone. She knew it, but I was oblivious. This is why she didn’t ask for my permission. It’s not my stone to throw. It’s a stone that I can curse, negate, ignore OR it is a stone that I can bless, admire and appreciate. But I don’t own it. I only own my reaction to it. Wow Kathie Lee, and iPod nano battery fail…. Thanks for the lesson I needed.
As David learned, the stone that fell Goliath was a metaphor for his willingness to serve God. You may not be the best qualified, there may be obstacles in your way; you may have your doubters. But throwing that stone lets you partner with God in his purpose. It mirrors your willingness to serve him, even in your weakness. It is a symbol of God’s power, not yours. 1 Samuel 17: 45-47
Needless to say, I was the only one crying on the treadmill that day. I told Susannah about my epiphany and that even though I will worry and miss her greatly, I can’t obstruct what she feels is God’s will for her. That’s not my role in this. I have to be honest and say that I am still learning my role. I know she needs encouragement, prayers, funds and positive vibes. It is a journey for me as well and I’m acclimating to the territory as best I can. As parents, we want our children to be happy, safe and feel loved in this world. That’s my base and I am trying to construct my approach to her mission trip with that foundation.
So far I have been overwhelmed with her dedication, her persistence in the face of doubters and the support she has received from friends, family and strangers alike. I have also been surprised at the silence from many who I thought would encourage and support her. As much as it has been and will continue to be a learning and growing experience for me, it’s her journey, her mission, her stone ultimately. But I will bless the aim of its path, the flick of her wrist, the power behind the throw, the high arcing trajectory of its flight and finally the purchase of its landing. A stone well thrown – KT”
Through strength not my own,
SK
