This phrase has always been one of the hardest statements to finish. When introducing myself to new people, there has always been that awkward moment when I stumble over my name saying, "Hi, my name is Ste…Pookie" and then having to clarify that I am not called Stepookie but Pookie, and yes, that is what I really go by.
For a large majority of my life, I've been known as Pookie. I recieved the name when I was around eight years old when my older sister Andrea really wanted a dog. My parents said no. She moved to Plan B: her little sister and since then the name has stuck. Teachers, bosses, relatives, and the guy who works on the Mo' Better BBQ truck all know me as Pookie. In fact, most people didn't even know that I had a real name. When I sent out high school graduation announcements, many people didn't know who I was. They simply thought that my name was Pookie and I had a little-known and rarely talked about other sister named Stephanie. And I was fine with that. Pookie was a great and memorable name to have and I established my identity around that.
Lately, God has been teaching me a lot about identity and who He called me to be. I am a daughter of God and have been established as an heir to the Kingdom of God (Galatians 4:5-7) but in the past few weeks, God has been calling me to go much deeper than that.
Many times in the Bible, when God called up some of His children to greatness, He commanded that they give everything up in order to follow His plan. Not only did they have a new purpose in life, but God also gave them a new name to seal the plans He had in store. Abraham would no longer be Abram, Sarai was no longer Sarah, and Saul changed his name to Paul. With their identity established, these men and women had nothing holding them back from reaching their full potential in Christ.
And now, I am establishing my identity.
My name is Stephanie. It is who God called me to be and I no longer want to be called Pookie. In this, I no longer need to question who I am because it was the name that I was given. Now it's time to rise to His calling.
To be candid, this was one of the hardest decisions I've ever made. Pookie was my identity for the longest time and Stephanie was used so rarely that many times I didn't even respond to it. I had spent around 15 years as solely Pookie and had formed my life around that. When God began speaking to me about my identity, I knew that I would have to stop living as Pookie but it's a rather difficult thing to give up something that you've known for so long. However, God didn't stop making it obnoxiously clear that my name had to change, so after wrestling with God on the matter, I tearfully and gravely gave up my old identity. I asked old friends to change my name in their phones, Facebook has been updated, and only this blog's name remains since web addresses are actually more permanent than most marriages these days.
I have no idea what God is doing in all of this, but I do know that He will bring great things from whatever plan He's got.
I am a new being. I am His daughter. I am an heir to His Kingdom. I am a child of a great God who was, and is, and knows of what's to come. I am Stephanie.
Stephanie: (Greek) "crowned one"
