As days shorten and a crisp chilly feel creeps into the wind’s touch, the leaves change from their summer costumes into their outfits for the fall finale. The beautiful death that is the autumn season is one of the highlights of the year for many, including myself, as leaves burst into color and dance off stage.
In some ways I feel my own life mirrors that of the changing season outside. The end of this race is merely a few weeks away and in a sense it will be a beautiful death. I expect over the coming days that this season of life will be marked with a brilliant display of God’s glory. Excitement stirs at the thought of what God has in store with our current ministry and that to come, but in the beauty of change there is a hint of sadness emerging.
The season that has encompassed this past year has been without doubt the hardest yet most rewarding thus far in my journey. There have been days I hated life and longed for nothing more than the familiar comforts of home. There have been many more that left me in awe and wonder of the creativity, majesty, beauty and love of God.
January seems like years ago as, like a leaf, this journey began to unfurl. I did not know what to expect but was convinced God had made a mistake and I could not possibly be cut out for it all. The season progressed and it was joyful to sway in the wind and bask in the sun even though there was a lot of pruning to endure. Somewhere along the course of our journey Manna, and H Squad as a whole, became my family and I became a bit of a social butterfly. Ministry has made me laugh, cry, rejoice and everything in between as different worlds collide, bringing a kingdom not our own and creating a beautiful collage of God’s love that transcends race, culture and language.
I accept that seasons must change. It is the natural course of life. I am eager to see family and friends, to eat food that has been discussed all year and to discover what God has in store for the future, yet I am once again leaving behind a family that I love dearly, knowing it will never again be the same.
Regardless of the pain ahead it is still beautiful and it is good. The leaves are changing and will soon lose their hold as they float to the ground. I have changed and continue to change and will soon be carried on the wind to the next place and season. The experiences and lessons from this year will become fertilizer for the future to strengthen the tree for what is to come.
After autumn comes winter, my least favorite of the seasons, but even there is beauty, meaning and life – it just may seem a little harder to find.
