“Life’s not fair.”
We’ve heard it ten thousand times probably. Usually we hear it when our sibling or someone gets something that we want and we don’t get it also. That cool toy, new shoes, a car, a college education paid for, that next big promotion, and so on.
But let’s talk about it from a Christian perspective. If life were “fair” then what would it look like?
Webster’s says fair is “treating people in a way that does not favor some over others” or “ not too harsh or critical”.
Let’s start with the first (we’ll get to the second later on). If life were fair, where people are treated in a way that does not favor some over others, then it seems like everything would be equal and we’d all get the promotions and the bonuses and the coolest new toys and electronics and everything would just be so blah because we’d all have the same stuff, there’d be no competition, and I fully believe competition can be a healthy thing.
Let’s all consider Romans 6:23 which says, ”For the wages of sin are death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.” The wages of sin…my paycheck for sinning…is death. I have sinned, and for sinning I have earned death. We all have, as Romans 3:23 tells us, “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” So if we all have sinned and the payment for sin is death, and the world were fair, then we all deserve death. We’re not talking mortality vs immortality; every human will die some day. We’re talking when we leave these physical bodies will we go to Heaven or to Hell? If the world were fair, we would all go to Hell, because we have all earned death. We deserve death. BUT, there’s more to Romans 6:23. It continues and says “…but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.” The free gift! Aren’t all gifts supposed to be free? If it truly is a gift, then shouldn’t it be free? I think God just wanted to make sure we understand, there are no strings attached. I can’t do anything to earn this gift. God is offering this free gift to me; all I have to do is accept it. The free gift is that I can have eternal life (as opposed to the eternal death I’ve earned and deserve) because of Jesus Christ. So, for those who “confess with their mouth that Jesus is Lord, and believe in their heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved” Romans 10:9. All that to say, yeah, the world is not fair.
You and I do not always get what we have earned or deserved, but do we really want to live a life that is fair, knowing what type of eternity that leads to? I don’t!
Now, let’s look at that second definition of fair, “not too harsh or critical.” I read this definition and I think of punishment. What if instead of saying “Life not fair!” we said “Life is unfair!” I’m still saying the same thing, just in different words.
If something is unfair, it is not fair, therefore it is not earned, and not deserved.
I want to word it this way so we can focus on things not being deserved. There are plenty of times and instances where we get something we don’t deserve. Sometimes this is good, and in our favor, sometimes we get ice cream when we weren’t on our best behavior that day. Sometimes, this is not in our favor and we get beat for something we either didn’t do, or something we did not deserve that severity of punishment for. In those times especially, Life is unfair, and I’ll be the first to jump in that boat. Sometimes I didn’t do anything, but my younger sister yelled and cried and my parents who were in other rooms or on other floors of the house assumed what was going on and I got in trouble. Sometimes I got punished for things I did not do. Sometimes we get in trouble or get yelled at or corrected at work for telling the truth. Life is unfair! Sometimes people lie to us or mislead us or just don’t follow through on the things they say they will, but hey, life’s unfair. People may even make promises and break them, but life’s unfair.
I just faced a situation where a friend told me they would do something multiple times, but they failed to follow through every time. It was hard at first because I have this huge burden of responsibility, meaning that if I say I am going to do something, I will pretty much go to the ends of the Earth to make it happen when I said it would happen. And if it just cannot happen, then I go to the person and I explain that I can’t follow through and I’m very apologetic and I carry a huge burden that it didn’t happen, and I make it happen as soon as I possibly can after that. BUT, not everyone is like that. Not everyone carries a burden of responsibility, actually, many people do not, and that’s okay. That’s how God wired them, and that’s how He wired me. It doesn’t mean it’s not hard or hurtful when people don’t follow through, but I have to remember not everyone is like me in that regard, and above all, that life’s unfair, and that works to my advantage more than my disadvantage. It doesn’t mean I did anything to deserve the person not following through, or lying about something being important to them but their actions not proving it. It doesn’t mean that I deserve them walking away even when they promised they were there. It doesn’t mean that anyone deserves for people to be mean, or hurtful, even when the hurt is unintentional, but it is a fact of life being unfair.
When life is unfair, I challenge you to see the positive in that statement. Life is unfair, but that’s great for me, because I can spend eternity in Heaven if I confess with my mouth and believe in my heart that Jesus is Lord.
Daddy God, I pray for your people Lord. I pray that we would constantly remember that Life being unfair is a good thing for us, because we can spend eternity with YOU. Help us to not take things personally and to seek understanding and clarity, and to offer grace to those people who are different from us. Lord, give us strength to be your light in this world, regardless of what other have and receive, regardless of if our boss hates us or loves, or if the next big promotion goes to the one who truly deserves it. Let us give all the glory to you, even when life seems unfair, and we seem to be getting the short end of the stick every time. AMEN.
