For months I have wondered if I should share a particular experience that happened while I was in Cambodia this year. I now feel lead to share this story. While in Cambodia, I heard the audible voice of a demon. It was an eye opening and scary experience for me and many other people. However, God taught me much through this experience. Some of which I thought it important to share with you. As you read this remember, God is bigger, His light always beats the dark, and victory is the Lord’s.
At the end of my month in Cambodia I was able to stay a week in Siem Reap with my co-leader at the Adventures in Mission’s guesthouse. During my first night there, I awoke around 5am to use the restroom. As I laid back in bed, I heard something. I realized it was a voice saying something. I listened harder and distinguished that it was saying, “it’s dead”. The voice was raspy and spoke in a whisper. Immediately I felt fear creep all the way down my spine and into my stomach. My brain reeled trying to make sense of what I was hearing. I started to pray and try to ignore it so I could sleep. But I couldn’t. I laid there awake in fear for the next two hours until others in the room started to wake up.
I asked others if they heard it. But with five girls in the room, it was never quiet enough for them to hear. All through the next day, I felt I couldn’t even talk about it because no one was taking it seriously. I mean what were they to think? They didn’t know what it was, but inside, I did. I knew it was demonic. Even though my whole life I had believed in a spiritual world, in angels and demons, I was blown away! My logical brain couldn’t handle it and I attempted to rationalize it to ‘logically make sense’.
The second night I could feel the fear rising as I got ready for bed. That night I woke up around 4:30am and heard the voice again. I put on my headphones and started listening to praise music. The voice sounded more faint but somehow I could still hear it with music blaring in my ears. As I listened to my music I had a thought: “maybe I should record it.” Eventually, I gathered my courage and recorded it for one minute. Within that minute I heard it twice. After I recorded it, I checked the recording and sure enough… I could hear it.
My co-leader woke me later that morning. I told her what happened and she listened to the recording. Her eyes got big as she heard the voice too. I felt a slight relief that it wasn’t all in my head and that someone else could hear it. We decided to tell the team at the morning meeting. Everyone was able to hear the voice on the recording. We decided that the building needed a ‘spiritual’ and a physical cleaning. We removed any decorations that were idol focused and prayed over each room. We also setup prayer shifts throughout the night.
That night we sang worship songs all together on the rooftop. It was a great time and the Holy Spirit’s presence could be felt. During the prayer shifts that night nobody heard anything. I started to feel okay again and peace settled in my heart. The next night two of our team members heard the voice in their room. As we strategized on what to do, I heard the voice. It was super loud this time. The whisper seemed more like a shout now and it sounded right behind me. My co-leader heard it too. We both started crying. It was so loud and we were both filled with so much fear. The two other girls were still calmly talking, we asked them if they could hear it and they said no. We couldn’t believe it. It was so loud, how could they not hear it?
Well, this was my first lesson from this experience. The more we allowed fear to take root in us, the more susceptible we were to hearing the voice. We can all take this lesson to our every day lives. The more fear we have, the more susceptible we are to the devil influencing us. When fear is removed, the devil loses his access point. So how can we remove fear? “Perfect love casts out all fear.” Only God’s love is perfect love. When we allow God’s love to overflow in us and we focus on His love for us, fear is cast out. I felt this internal battle many times as I fought to keep fear off me whenever I heard the voice. It became obvious to me how crippling fear can be and why “fear not” shows up so often in the Bible.
Throughout the rest of the week it was much the same. We heard it, but learned to ignore it and keep our focus on God. With many prayers, a lot of sleepless night and tears it got easier and easier. One day, I was working on cleaning the wall where I knew it was bound. I was calm and peaceful and didn’t hear anything, but I could still sense it. I still felt its presence. I knew it was there somewhere. At that moment I felt God say to my spirit: “See how aware you are of the demons presence? This is how aware of Me I want you to be.”
I was floored. What an amazing truth. How terrible that I had been much more aware of the presence of a demon, than I was of the Holy Spirit who lives inside of me! I wanted to feel God’s presence in my life just as tangible as my experience with the demon. I have never heard God’s voice or an angel’s voice audibly but I have a demon. I decided that I wanted to be aware of God’s presence in my life every single day. The spirit realm is real. If demons are real, then God is real. If the demons are tangible, then God is tangible. That night I envisioned the Holy Spirit with me in the room. I pictured what he looked like (hard to describe it to you). I felt so much peace because I knew that I wasn’t just imagining him, he really was there! From that day on, whenever I am afraid about something or uncertain, I imagine the Holy Spirit with me in the room.
Another lesson I learned, don’t go look for the demonic! If you seek it, you will find it! Don’t do it in any aspect of your life. One of the guys on the team hadn’t ever heard the voice himself. So, one night he sat up and listened for it… sure enough, he heard it. We are called to focus our attention on the light and not the darkness. Something one of my mentors told me during the experience was: “Don’t dig in the dark. Stay in the light.” That was such great advice for me. The more we think about the darkness or the terrible things going on, the worst it will get. If we keep our minds on God and on the light, the darkness grows weak and we can find victory in things we are struggling with.
Months after this experience, I was rethinking about all that happened in Cambodia and all that I learned. I had the thought: “wow that was a crazy scary and dangerous time”. I sensed God correcting me by saying: “actually that wasn’t scary or dangerous at all”. I felt Him say that the most dangerous form the enemy takes is a voice that we believe is our own thinking inside our own head. In our thought life. Lies that we believe are truths in our lives. Thoughts that we think are our own or sometimes we might even mistake a demonic voice as the voice of God. Wow, so true. The real dangerous and difficult battle is not a frontal attack from a demon. It’s when the enemy attacks us through our own thoughts. That is where the real every day battle is fought.
As God said this to me, He pointed out that I was doing it that very moment. That day I had been fighting a headache, menstrual pains, and feelings of frustration and annoyance. I had thought, “oh poor me, I am so attacked right now with so many things going on that the enemy is throwing at me.” God asked me why I was digging in the darkness? Why I was focusing on all the bad that was going on around me instead of focusing on the light; on Him and all that He was doing in my life. At that moment I started to think about everything good going on in my life and all that God has given me and how great and powerful He is and that He is already victorious against everything and anything I face in this lifetime. I immediately felt better. I took my thoughts and the lies from the enemy and exposed them to the light, to the truths of God, and everything changed.
You see, God wants us to stay focused on the light in everything we do. We are to “take captive every thought’”and hold them up to His light and His truths for our life. When we do this, the lies of the enemy dissipate and lose their hold on our hearts.
Don’t listen to the voice of darkness, listen to the light. Staying focused on our Lord and Savior Jesus is the only way to stay in the light. I want you to ask yourself: “In what areas of your life are you digging in the dark? What areas in your life do you need to bring to the light?” Let God tell you His truths that will help combat the lies of darkness that fill your and my minds.
Ignore the enemy, captivate every thought, claim victory and focus on Jesus’ light.
