So, after two weeks of traveling around the states, and 6 moves later, I finally made it back to my own bed. Los Angeles, San Diego, Minneapolis and St. Paul, and Cedar Falls – the journey was filled with friends, family and solitude. Also, time to reflect, to cry, to laugh, to be so exited I just have to jump up and down, to share, to be frustrated and confused, to love…Who said this pilgrimage was over?
Is the question:
1) I don’t fit into [it] the way I used to? (I take the ‘blame’)
2) [It] doesn’t fit me the way [it] used to? (Place the ‘blame’ on another)
It’s quite interesting currently applying this question to me and the ‘familiar’ world – places, faces, perspectives and attitudes – that surrounds me. I can draw two conclusions:
1) I don’t quite ‘fit’ the way I used to. (realizing that I have changed)
2) The [world] doesn’t ‘fit’ me like it used to. (realizing that everything around me changed)
I think that placing the entire ‘blame’ on one of these conclusions would be a fatal error and cause mind games. Realizing, first and foremost, that I have changed is crucial for returning to any place, person or thing that has been physically, spiritually or emotionally absent during this period of intense growth. I need to remember to check myself before I even think about checking another.
“We do not see things as they are; we see things as we are!” – a Jewish saying
On the flip side, it would be a tragic error to come to the conclusion that ‘I am the only one who has grown or changed over this past year’! So please, tell your story. I want to hear. And ‘No”, it is not boring and ‘YES’ it is worth telling! You have all experienced growth and change – be it physical, emotional, spiritual – so please share! I have to be OK with the fact that my world back home did not stop while I was gone. Babies were born; people died; relationships formed and were broken; jobs changed, were lost or promoted.
Hidden under the long talks and personal investment, the ‘Gold’ will be found. Physical change is surface; but the true story lies within. And that has to be uncovered. Are you willing to go there with me? Am I willing to go there with you? To ask the hard questions – the ones that might hold us both accountable for what we know? Will we both push through the façade of “I’m good. It was all hunky dory.”?
A question that has been on my heart is: “Am I willing to unlock the treasures and emotions of what I discovered around the world over this past year to individuals who may not even be able to comprehend or understand the magnitude of what I am attempting to express? (I’m not assuming any blame or judgment on anyone. I’m just having a face off with reality!) Will I take that chance? Will you take that chance?
WE HAVE TO TAKE THAT CHANCE! We have to tell our stories…and more importantly, we owe it to ourselves, friends and family to listen to the stories that unfolded while we were absent. We have a lot to learn from each other, and a whole heck of a lot more to learn about ourselves and our Maker.
…A community that’s committed to each other…a rise of a movement committed to loving and serving God…Isn’t that what it’s all about?
So, please share your stories.
To those I have already hugged and to those who’s hug is still coming…thank you! Thank you for sharing this adventure with me: the tears, the prayers, the miracles. Your support has been a huge encouragement to me throughout the past year. It was an honor to share it with you.
So, what’s next? Keep telling stories while building new ones. That’s my vision for now. Pretty simple. Sharing and building through conversations, writing, photography, cooking, artistic creations; however it is best expressed at the time. Building includes inviting and inviting is key to discipleship. So, it would be fair to say the invitation still stands. For all of you who feed off of details, the best I am able to give you is that this might include a leadership training school in Spain – possibly as early as this coming spring or summer. But, right now, help me in celebrating the mystery of being…
This journey takes a turn onto a path less trodden; a path called faith whose nickname is ‘reckless abandon’; a path where innate dreams, passions and desires are met by a loving, living, intimate Creator. A Bridegroom who delights in each step taken on this pilgrimage to FULLY ALIVE.
