This morning we had a team devotional to start off our day. During that time, I opened up to my team about how I was still struggling with things. I had a hard month, and on top of that, I recently had to mourn the loss of my uncle’s sudden death. Because of that, I have been feeling homesick lately. I’ve also not been feeling well, so that doesn’t help either. I shared with them how I was feeling emotionally/physically exhausted. After our devo, we had some down time before lunch, and then decided to hang out at the local mall for a few hours.
I had a great day! I put all my junk aside and enjoyed my team and experiencing this amazing new culture that I’m immersed in. We left the mall about 4:30 to be home in time for our nightly devotional with our hosts. To get home we take a type of transportation that’s kind of like a mini bus that has two long rows in the back that face each other. Usually they pack out the bus before they start driving to drop people off. To pack ourselves in, there’s a lot of scooting and smooshing ourselves together. Our team got in and I was sitting next to one teammate, and my other teammates were in front of us. People started to pile on, and I notice an older man get on. I scoot towards my teammate on my left to give him plenty of room on my right. However, he keeps going and squeezes right in between us. I thought that was weird, but thought maybe he gets his jollies sitting in between two American girls or something. (Later on, a few teammates noticed that too and thought the exact same thing.) We pay for our ride, and since I am the team treasurer, I paid for it, and then put my wallet back in my bag like I always do.
Our ride was about 10 minutes or so until we were dropped off to take another little tuk tuk to our house. We get to the house and I get out my wallet to pay the guy, but my wallet isn’t there! I was so confused. I’m very organized and barely ever misplace things, so I couldn’t figure out where it was. My purse was zipped up and everything. Then it hit me. I was robbed.
REALLY?? OF ALL DAYS!!! OF ALL PEOPLE TO ROB ON THAT BUS!! I was already upset that day! Did this really happen?? I am usually always careful and aware with my bag, but I bought a new guitar, so where I usually set my bag on my lap, my guitar was there instead.
I was a little upset, because my wallet with my personal cash AND team cash was taken. I tried to calm down a little even though I was still shaken up from the shock of it all. I went inside then thought that I should check to see if anything else was taken. Yep. My camera too.
UNBELIEVABLE!!! That pushed me over the edge. I just went straight up to our room and cried. What is going on?! Why am I getting so beat up these days? Every time I see a glimpse of hope or get encouragement to be back to “regular, happy Stephanie” who just wants to enjoy this race and ministries, I keep getting slammed! It’s like in the Lion King when Mufasa is trying to climb the mountain to safety and he keeps slipping on the dirt and rocks. (My team randomly watched Lion King recently so it came to mind.) I keep pressing on, but it’s taking so much strength and energy and I feel exhausted!
Some of my girls on the team prayed over me. They prayed that I would keep persevering even though I do keep getting hit. It’s spiritual warfare and Satan is attacking me like crazy lately. He’s trying to kill my spirit and make me feel defeated. I don’t want him to win. I begin to look on the bright side:
Even though getting robbed absolutely SUCKED, it could have been worse. He could have stolen my cards, but I had them in another place separate from my cash. He could have stolen my passport, but I don’t carry that around with me. He could have used violence, but he did it without anyone noticing. Even my teammates who were right across from him never saw a thing! And my teammate on the other side of him at one point turned and gave him a big friendly smile! So messed up. But I guess that’s reality. Not everyone is going to be nice and some people take advantage of others for whatever reason. I’m not going to let it get me down. My things are replaceable, and life goes on. God even showed me the same verse TWICE tonight by two separate people: my teammate who prayed over me and the girl who led the nightly devotional.
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 ~ Rejoice always, pray with out ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.
So again, I’m not going to let this get me down, and I will give thanks in this because God must have a way He will use this to His glory. And to be honest, I actually have a peace in myself today more now, than I have had in days.
