“What the HECK was I thinking?”
This phrase pretty much sums up my life recently. It runs through my mind multiple times a day, for a host of different reasons.
First, I’ve started reading lots of blog entries from people currently on the race, which is very eye opening. But after reading blog entries about eating tarantulas that squirt juice like gushers, and about worms laying egg sacks in people’s feet, about the craziness of the African bus rides, and a host of other insane life experiences that await me, I am constantly asking myself “what the HECK was I thinking when I signed up for this?”
I wish this phrase was limited to my thoughts about the World Race, but alas, it is not. In addition to preparing to go on the World Race, I am also preparing for another race: a full marathon in November. My good friend, Kate, asked me to run with her after she took up running and lost a bunch of weight (she looks absolutely AMAZING, by the way), and I just couldn’t say no. I must have been delirious when I agreed, because had I known what marathon training was going to be like, I probably would have refused. It’s at about mile 4 of a 20 mile run that I’m left thinking “what the HECK did I get myself into?”
As if those two things weren’t enough, this week is my last week at my job. What kind of crazy person quits a good job with a good salary to travel around the most remote places in the world with only a small backpack and a tent to sleep in? What the heck was I thinking when I decided to leave the comfort and security that I have come to know?
This past Sunday, my friends and I went skydiving. I jumped out of a plane two miles above the earth for not the first, not the second, but the third time in my life. Again, what the heck was I thinking?
These are just a few examples of the crazy things I’ve decided to do recently that have left me questioning my sanity. But after much reflection on the state of my mental stability, I’ve come to realize that despite the seeming insanity of my life choices, I would do it all over again (yes, even signing up to run a marathon). So what, exactly, was I thinking when I signed up for all of this? Well, I’m not exactly sure, but I’d much rather do crazy things than sit back in my comfortable little bubble and never experience what life has to offer. If I’ve learned anything recently, it’s that life is short, and that I will regret the things that I didn’t do more than I will ever regret doing the things in life that may seem crazy to begin with.
