**Attached is a letter that I typed up for
my older sister, Shannon, who had previously spent 9 months in Central America
serving as a missionary with Mother Teresa’s order of nuns. Her work greatly
influenced me to do missions work myself, and is a large part of why I came on
the race. I decided to use this letter as my blog (even though I haven’t sent it to her yet… haha) because I think it captures
my raw emotions and though on the subject of ministry and think that others
will benefit from it as well.**
Dear Shannon-
Today, I was comparing your mission trip to mine. Or at
least, the perception I had of your trip.
To me, your trip consisted of lots of continuous, hard work.
I have the mindset that to you, ministry is about doing things, and about
seeing tangible results. When you prayed for a busy month for me, it gave me
the impression that if we aren’t working, we are wasting time.
When I look at what we are doing here, I feel empty. I feel
that what we are doing is worthless because we don’t have tangible results. So
we must not have accomplished anything.
I am so afraid to tell people what we’re doing because I think
they will look down upon me and tell me that what I did was a waste of time and
money. I am afraid that they will think this trip is worthless and that we
aren’t making an actual difference in the world.
This month, we are not feeding hungry people. We are not
building a house. We are not changing diapers or giving clothes to those who
need them. We aren’t chopping down a field or picking up trash. Most of this
month is downtime; time in between ministry to talk with each other, read our
bibles, workout, and have community together. And when we are doing ministry,
we are mostly sharing our stories, doing skits, singing songs, playing soccer
with the nurses, or praying for people on the street.
Even writing this I am reminded of the verse in scripture
that talks about letting your works shine before men so they might know the
glory of God. Then there is the Christian mindset that you should share the
gospel at all times, and when necessary, use words. (Someone famous said that,
I’m sure you know whom, but I can’t remember).
But then I think about Jesus. The Bible also calls us to
conform our lives to His. But when I think about his life, I think about how
often he simply sat and talked with people. How often did he walk up to someone
on the street and pray over him/her. How often did he have 5-10 minute
relationships with people? He never built a house. He didn’t change diapers or
pick up trash from the streets. Sure he fed people, healed people, and
performed other miracles, but the majority of his ministry was simply talking
to people; telling them the truth and encouraging them in their faith.
So what then is ministry supposed to look like? Is there a
right and wrong? Is this a waste of time? Does God smile down on us with a
happy heart? Are we making Him proud? Does He think we are wasting time and
money?
Or is this exactly where He wants me?
Maybe your mission was to serve with acts and deeds. Maybe
mine is to serve with words and prayer. And maybe next month we will build a
house.
-Stacy
Shannon and I in front of the White House!
