Sacrifice.
I thought I knew what that meant.
I mean… I came on the World Race. That requires some sacrifice right? I left a job I love, my family, my friends, a nice comfy bed and hot showers. I sacrificed my right to eat healthy food and cook for myself. I sacrificed my right to being alone.
I know what it means to sacrifice.
Until today that is…
Today, one simple act of obedience, taught me more than any school ever has.
We met a lady during village ministry who needed our encouragement. She welcomed us at the door with a smile that lit up her tired eyes. We all gathered in her home, seated on the floor. Our translators explained to us that her husband is angry and violent. Recently during one fit of anger he actually burned all of her children’s clothing and their furniture.
Then our translator, Juliet, who also happens to be our pastor/contact’s wife looked at me and said “She needs encouragement, what are you going to share to encourage her?”
Me? No pressure or anything.
So I started to share a story I have gone back to recently: the story of Joseph. I started to speak and even though I thought I was getting to the point that God can redeem a horrible situation for His glory I felt Him telling me to drive home the point of forgiveness. But my spiritual knees buckled and I thought “how can I look at this woman knowing what she has been through and rub salt in her wounds by telling her she needs to forgive him? That’s not encouraging.”
So instead I told her that God is faithful. That even though her situation seems terrible God can use it to save her life and the lives of others like He did for Joseph. And that was true. But I also knew God wanted to say more to her. As soon as I stopped speaking, Juliet spoke up. The Lord was obviously speaking to her too because she picked right up where I should have continued, telling this woman that God wanted her to forgive her husband.
I am so glad His work still happens despite my flaws. And I am so glad He continues to use me even though I learn daily that He doesn’t need me.
But the real lesson came a few minutes later.
We shared another verse with her (Psalm 27) and prayed. Then as we began to sing “Our God Is An Awesome God” she slipped behind the curtain and came back a moment later with a plate full of meat. Cow liver. Enough to feed her family for several days. She began to slice in to it and I realized what was happening. She is giving us part of her food.But she didn’t give us part of it…
She gave us all of it.
She wrapped it for us to take leaving only crumbs on the plate in her hand. Then she fell to her knees before us. She thanked us profusely and told us we were angels sent straight from The Lord for her today.
As she fell to her knees, a few small crumbs fell to the ground. Her children raced inside to pick up the crumbs and eat them.
Watching those sweet children scramble for what tiny crumbs they could find I learned what true sacrifice is.
It was beautiful and humbling and I felt so unworthy to even be in that room with her. It’s not like we swept in with the promise of a restored marriage and a husbands heart turning to God. We gave her a hard pill to swallow. Juliet told her she needed to forgive the man who was trying to destroy her life. Yet she thanked us profusely and uttered praises to God for what He had said to her. It was worship in it’s purest form.
It was an intimate moment between her and The Lord as she bowed before him. It surely wasn’t me or my team she was sacrificing too or kneeling before. It was Jesus. It was the presence of the living God in her home today that brought her to her knees.
And all I can do is say thank you over and over again to God for letting me be there. Thank you over and over again for teaching me what true sacrifice is.
“The Lord is my light and salvation-whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life- oh whom shall I be afraid?…though an army besiege me, my heart will not fear; though war break out against me, even then I will be confident.” -Psalm 27:1-3
