The past eleven months have gone by so fast, it is hard to believe that I am going to be back in the States in two weeks. A lot has happened this year and clearly it has made a significant impact on my life. However, now that the eleven months are almost over, I look back and see that I may have been completely naive when I began this journey. I honestly believed that God would use these eleven months to show me the direction for my future. I thought that I would have a clear understanding of my passions and calling and that upon returning from the World Race, I would be able to fully commit to a career path. Now that I am almost done, the most common question that I am asked by everyone is, "So what's next?" Despite all that I have gone through and experienced this year, my simple answer is…
I don't know.
My future is still completely uncertain. This pilgrimage has not lead me to a final destination of understanding or enlightenment, instead by seeing the world, I am probably more lost than I was when I left. In all of this, I have to trust that God has a reason for all I experienced on the World Race, and that He will use it to prepare me for whatever plan he has for my future. I have to believe that God is going to use everything from the joys and pains of my past, the times I have fallen to what felt like irredeemable depths, the mountain top moments where sensed God nearby, and to the past eleven months of some of the hardest and greatest moments in my life.
All I can do is trust.
A true life of trust is movement into the gray, the ambiguous, and the undefined. In such a place, God can be the one leading the way, not me.
As much as I hate not knowing what is next, I know what I am called to do. Each and every day I have to die to myself and rely on God alone. This dying to self is a lifelong process that cannot be justified by a year long trip of abandonment. This past year was simply the start, not the end. As Henri Nouwen states, "affirm your life as a quest… our lives are not problems to be solved but journeys to be taken with Jesus as our friend and finest guide."
I know that I don't do well when I lack control over a situation, however that is exactly what I am called to do. I must release my future to God and trust that he will be fully in control and direct me according to what is best and in his will.
So my rough plan for now is to arrive in the U.S. on July 30th and stay in New York till August 1st. I will then fly to California where I plan to spend roughly a month. I am really looking forward to catching up with all of my family and friends. During that month, I will be job searching and seeing what doors may open. If God doesn't have anything immediate for me, I am thinking about returning to Japan for 3+ months to help with the relief efforts. After all of that, hopefully God will show and direct me to what is next.
I would really appreciate your prayer and support in the midst of this time of transition. Please pray that God would direct my path, provide financially, and that I would effective and efficient in all that I do. If you have any ideas or suggestions for work or direction, I would love to hear from you.
Eating together as a team for the last time. The La Rosa's had to leave a little over a week early due to a family member's wedding. Slowly things are coming to an end…
