(My brother Shawn. And my nephew Remington.)
So I’m home… And have been for a little over a month now. It’s really good to be home, but kind of strange at the same time. For a while there it was quite the emotional roller coaster. But it has started to even out now. More than anything it feels like this passed year of the Race didn’t even happen.
So there’s this thing called “Re-entry”. Sounds fun right? Yeah that's what I thought. I really didn’t think it would be that hard. I mean I’ve done this coming-back-to-America thing before. And it wasn’t hard the last few times. I mean sure it was different, but it wasn’t hard. I had heard stories of people going into grocery stores and breaking down, and I thought, “Psh! That won’t be me…. I’m not that emotional…” Boy was I wrong. I was one of those people. The first night I was back in the states I went to Walgreens to buy some hygiene products; I made it to the snack isle when the tears came unexpectedly. My brother looked at me with a worried, but expectant look and I managed a “This is one of those moments…” I went outside and cried in the parking lot while he checked out. The next few days were full of random moments that came so unexpectedly and overwhelmed me with emotions. Some one was rude to me at the Mcdonald's in the airport on the way home and I cried… My friends bought me lunch and I cried… There were times where I felt like I was a stranger walking around in my own life. Interacting with strangers who were supposed to be my friends and family. In these moments I would have to find a quite place and cry.
You see I cried a lot… I was an emotional wreck. But I guess that is to be expected. The life I had known was gone. The life I had lived for a year, that was so different from this life, had disappeared. No more team time. No more team. Comfort all around me. Alone time?! What was I going to do??? I had changed. And so had everyone else. Life didn’t stop while I was gone. A few of my friends are in serious relationships and thinking of getting married and I hadn’t even met their significant others. How was I going to fit back into this life?
I was still kind of feeling all of these things when I went down to Georgia for our squad’s Project Searchlight. A reunion time with teaching and lots of Jesus. And it turned out to be an amazing week. God spoke to me a lot about what He has planned for me now that I’m home. Which looks a lot like reflecting on this past year and spending a lot of time with Him. Learning discipline on my own terms. Finding Him in new ways and in new places among the old ways and familiar places.
What’s next? I am looking into going to this program that Adventures in Missions, the organization that The World Race is through, is doing for alumni Racers called CGA (Center for Global Action) that will be happening in Abilene, TX some time in the near future. They are setting up a healing track where you go to be healed and to learn to heal others. I have felt a strong leading from the Spirit to go there. So that is the next goal. While there I will be taking classes in the supernatural, getting discipled and learning how to disciple others. I will give more details on that as it develops.
My next steps are to find a job. At least for the next few months. So I’m looking for one of those… And praying that God will put me where He wants me, where I can be of best service and shine the most light for His name. I know He will be faithful to putting me where He wants me. So now I just need to find out where that is.
As always God is good. And I wanted to thank all of you for staying faithful to me and following my adventure all the way through. You are all amazing. And I am so blessed that God allowed me to share my life with you over the past months. So thank you again. I’ll keep you updated on things about CGA as I know more about it. 🙂
