“drop your arms”
“i can’t…”
“come on, let go! it’ll be more fun!”
“i really can’t”
as i hang there upside down suspended by nothing but wires and metal clips, i release a shaky breath. i want to let go, i really do, but my chunky glove-covered hands seem stuck to the rope.
with a heavy sigh from my zip lining guide followed by a sudden rush, i find myself zooming hundreds of feet above a roaring river. the sound of the waterfall and view of the green mountainside are met by my giddy smile. as blood rushes to my head, i fly down the wire hanging upside down with legs crossed and fingers clenched ever tighter around the grey rope slightly above my head.
as my eyes shift from the jungle beneath me to my hands, my guide’s words echo in my mind “let go! it’ll be more fun!” my eyes flicker back to the jungle floor. “haha noooo way i’m doing that” it’s not that i didn’t trust my guide or the wires suspending me, i was simply just too afraid to let go.
reflecting back on those few moments, i can’t help but think how many times God has asked me to let go but me being too afraid, prideful, and stubborn said no. i proclaim that i trust in God and all He says He is, but yet i often find my hands still holding tightly to the rope, refusing to let go- and that’s not what faith is supposed to look like. faith is belief combined with action and a lot of the time, if not all of the time, that means letting go and stepping out in full confidence, not in my own abilities but in the One who holds, supports, and guides me safely over roaring rivers. saying no to letting go wasn’t me just refusing to give up the comfort of what i was holding onto, but also a no to all of the freedom and joy He desired to place into my unclenched hands.
letting go is scary and it’s hard, even with all of that truth in mind. therefore it is my daily choice to not only believe in God’s provision, but step boldly out into it so that i may live in the abundance of His presence. the hard reality is that even if i am resting in the mighty wires of His sovereign hand but still holding onto my own rope, then my reluctance to let go lessens the personal and communal impact of the journey God has prepared for me. so as i sit here watching the sun set over the mountains of ecuador, i pray that God reveal to my heart the “ropes” to which my hands are wrapped too tightly around so that i may live with a deeper confidence and fuller awareness of His faithfulness.
