Man where do I begin!
A brief recap, I began taking steps to serve those in need ; 11 countries in one year through acts of love. The country list is Guatemala, Nicaragua, Panama, Swaziland, Lesotho, South Africa, Malaysia, Thailand, Cambodia, Indonesia, and the Philippines. This month we are in Guatemala!
Lately, the phrase of the moment is, “I don’t know what to feel.” This followed by an outburst of tears! I’m just so grateful. This past 3 months, no 6 months, NO year has been unbelievable! I feel like the caps on life have been slowly removed, one by one never to be found again. That’s because God has been saying, “Let ME set the limits, just trust ME!” But now I want to let you in on just what has me bursting into tears. ..
Fundraising
It was getting very close to launch, where I would meet up with my team in Atlanta. The first ministry site would be Chimaltenango, Guatemala and fundraising had come to a stop. I was asking God what’s next because I don’t see it and time seems to be running out. The clearest push I got from him was a sermon called “Let’s keep it moving.” The pastor challenged us that God is always on the move and we need to stay open to move w/ him. So by faith I bought my ticket to training camp and a month later to launch.
It had been weeks since the last donation had come in but I knew that God had already been clear and the direction never changed so this meant it was time to dig in and stand firm. During the time of waiting “Stand Firm” for me meant to stay focused on the work I believed he invited me into. So I continued to pray, reach out, and seek out more fundraising ideas. Honestly, at some points I began to feel a little discouraged but God kept putting people in my path who were willing to believe in me. More importantly they believed in the greater invitation I’d been given and wanted to see it come to fruition!
By the week of launch I was still not at the funding goal but I saw that God was still moving thru many people’s sacrificial giving. I had a conversation with my World Race mentor telling her that I still planned on coming because I felt strongly that God wanted me to continue leaning into this. So I continued to prepare and then flew out to launch. This was SCARY to say the least and just because you choose to trust doesn’t mean all your emotions easily subside. The afternoon of October 7th my mentor notified me that I had received an anonymous donation the brought my funding to the minimum amount to fly out!! NOW, here I am typing this blog entry in the house of my first ministry host.
Family
My most consistent definition of family has always been Grandma, Mom, my sister Kenya, my brother Matthew and my dogs. If I had to choose a safe place it would be whenever or wherever they were with me, though I love people, new places all types of discoveries! The best moments are when I get to end my day in the comfort of their love. They have seen my most silly, playful, angry, vulnerable self and loved me through it unlike any other relationship I’d ever experienced. But as life progresses things can’t stay the same and even your family that may be there for you must branch out in new ways. You will not always be able to be with them for one reason or another and that my friend is SCARY. This was really thrown in my face when it became clear that I would not be able to keep my dogs.
Before I really knew what it meant I began to say, “God I trust you with my life, my future and all that I love”, but I didn’t realize it was more of a question. God can I trust you? I realize now that all those things I’ve held onto gave me a feeling of safety but in reality it was only a reflection of his love for me. He is my safe place and he is more than capable to provide, sustain, and protect. It’s a new level of vulnerability but everything I give to him he keeps showing me that he has me. He provided a loving home for my fur babies, granted favor on my family’s current endeavors and keeps expanding my definition of family. It only becomes more and more real as I look him. Like a baby learning to walk with a father’s hand to keep her steady and his voice to bring comfort. God is teaching me that I can walk with him in absolute TRUST. SO I’m open to the discomfort as he guides my footsteps through the rapid changes swirling around me!
“Forget the former things; Do not dwell on the past. See I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; Do you not perceive it? I am making a new way in the desert and streams in the wasteland.”
-Isaiah 43:18-19
******Thank you for your support! My next goal is $13,ooo, I am currently at $9,187. Please help me reach the next funding goal. The deadline is November 11th.
