Ministry: Thrive Rescue Home
Location: Pattaya, Thailand
In Part One I shared about our night in a bar hanging out with women who are prostitutes. In this post, I share how my heart was changed towards those who buy them.
I’ve watched porn.
I’ve been drunk.
I’ve been to strip clubs.
I’ve kissed a girl for attention.
I’ve had sex.
I did it all for one simple reason: I was seeking something. For the most part it was acceptance from those around me. But many times my choices came from a desperate desire to feel attractive, worthy, in control, and loved. In all my years of partying and wildness there is one sad, but constant truth: the mornings after sucked. I always felt empty and searching for more. I’ll also admit that in the moment most of these things were..gasp..fun. It felt good and it felt right. Again, until the morning after.
In the destructive cycle that is sin, the more I did these things the emptier I felt and the emptier I felt the more I did these things to fill the emptiness. Sound familiar?
Recently I had a couple of nights out and a mornings after. Me and the girls spent a couple of nights on Walking Street in Pattaya. Pattaya is known as one of the sex capitals of the world, specifically as the top city for child sex trafficking.
Walking down the street you’ll see bars, girls dancing on stripper poles and cages, and brothels. The streets are lined with half naked women and lady boys standing underneath the bright neon lights, doing their best to get bought by one of many foreign men. One of the most disturbing things I saw was the amount of parents who had their children there. I vividly remember a mom made her son of about 8-10 years old to stand next to a bar girl for a picture. I sadly thought “what chance does he have?”
Night One. Where are my Feelings?
You’d think seeing these sights would upset me. I mean, I would. I’m a missionary. I’ve taught classes on social justice. I’ve volunteered with an anti-trafficking organization. I should be heartbroken, torn apart, and wanting to tell everyone off! Wrong. I was a little saddened at points. But as I walked down the street, I was the most angry that I wasn’t angry.
I quickly realized, I’m desynthesized. Yes, me and probably most of you. We are bombarded with stories & images of evil, wickedness, and violence. After a while, many of us respond with “oh, again? I’m not surprised.” We shrug our shoulders, make a sly comment about how messed up the world is (Christians usually go a step further and add how we can’t wait til Jesus comes back) and life goes on. For me, my heart was hardened and used to blatant sin and injustice that even seeing it to this degree did nothing.
Night Two. Tears, Don’t Run Dry.
When I awoke the next morning I spent time reflecting on what I experienced. By the time we left, the emptiness I felt was filled with a compassion and mercy for the people on Walking Street, especially the consumers.
God reminded me of my own past and the path He delivered me from. A path that unchecked could have easily led me to Walking Street under the name of “fun, I’m in my twenties, or YOLO.” I was reminded that morning of all the mornings I awoke feeling foolish and shameful because once again-the sex, alcohol, and really short dress didn’t work. I wondered how many of the people that go to Walking Street wake up feeling a similar way. Or even worse, are to the point of not feeling at all? Their hearts and head are so disconnected from God that cheap pleasures has become their pursuit in life.
With this new perspective, I got angry. I so badly wanted everyone on Walking Street to know that there was more. There was something offered to them that was good. And it’s free! I was angry knowing all that was being stolen from the people there. I was angry seeing the assault on the next generation through their parents who have no idea the damage they are doing to their kids’ spirits and outlook on humanity. I was angry thinking of the women, children, and lady boys that experience trauma and abuse night after night. I was angry because I know Jesus, the One who can fix it all, yet I felt helpless.
That night my team went back to Walking Street. This time we went with a purpose: to be a light in the darkness. So, some of the girls found a corner on the street and sang Christmas carols, Kristina danced, and the rest of us walked and prayed.
Roses for Men?
I walked with my squad leader Laura who had the brilliant idea of offering a kind gesture to the men there. So, she bought 5 roses and we walked around and gave them to men. We handed it to them with a smile and a simple “Merry Christmas.” It was a small act of kindness that caught every single one of them off guard. One even asked “why?” In the moment it felt like what we were doing was so small, but it brought me so much joy. It is my prayer and confidence that in that small, startling act of kindness that at least one of the men woke up the next morning and thought: “what was that rose and Merry Christmas thing about?” I know that his curiosity will soften his heart.
As we left for the night, I chuckled at what we had just done and the sight we must have been. We didn’t pray for anyone directly or tell anyone we were Christians (even though a women walked past us laughing and pointing “They’re Christians”), but it obviously worked. And if she knew who we were, Satan definitely knew. And although it’s hard knowing the women are still selling and the men are still buying, I know that our presence and prayers those two nights were heard on high and that change is coming to Walking Street. It, like everything and everyone is a part of God’s plan for redemption. Like he did with me, new mornings are coming. This Christmas, I’m grateful to have been a part of that wondrous plan.
Want to know more about our time in Pattaya? Read the following blogs from my teammates and Squad Leaders:
Men are Scum of the Earth and Other Glad Tidings of Comfort and Joy
“Good Guys go to Heaven, Bad Guys go to Pattaya”
A Glorious Wedding, Foreign Women, and Finding Redemption
Christmas with the Prostitutes
MAKE A DONATION: I still need $3,944 to cover the cost for this trip. If you are able to support me financially, click SUPPORT ME” on the left to make a tax-deductible donation. Or, cut out the small online processing fee by mailing a check to:
Adventures in Missions
PO Box 534470
Atlanta, GA 30353-4470
Checks should be made out to “Adventures in Missions”
***Put “PERKINSSHATERIKA” in the memo line of the check!!!!!***
