Warning! This is a long post. Please read all the way through or not at all. It’s raw and vulnerable. I do not mean any disrespect from my words. I am just letting out some of what has been on my heart. At the end of the Race, I plan to write a blog about tips on how to survive the Race as an introvert.
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To be perfectly honest, I’ve about had enough…. I’m joking, but not really. Don’t get me wrong though. I love every single individual of O squad. But, when I wake up to them talking really loudly to each other, music playing, doors slamming and people in and out of our room, I get a little frustrated. Even when I’m showering or using the toilet, it never fails that someone knocks and says they really have to go.
I know 10 months from now when I’ve been home for a while and it’s just me and Kenna, my dog, in the morning, a little part of me will miss the squad, the noise, and the 15 different conversations going on at once. I’ll probably stay in the bathroom for a really long time, just because. The other part of me though will relish the quiet.
One of my teammates, Lauren, keeps reminding me to choose joy. It’s what keeps me going. At Training Camp back in August, we were admonished to choose humility, choose joy, and to choose intentionality every day on the Race and for the rest of our lives. After all, that’s how Jesus lived. Lauren calls me higher to this everyday, and I’m so grateful for her. Through the Holy Spirit, I’m trying to embody peace in the midst of this All-squad month storm.
To conclude, please do not feel sorry for me! I’m so thankful for the opportunity to be on the World Race. God called me here, and I’d rather not be anywhere else in the world at this time. The frustrating and annoying moments do not outweigh the joy-filled life-giving moments of bringing the love of Jesus to the nations.
God is teaching me PATIENCE this month. I know at the end of this month, the Lord will reveal even more of what all-squad month is preparing me for.
The last all-squad month in Thailand (November), I could escape to a coffee shop to be by myself. Here in Manzini, we can not be alone due to safety parameters given to us by our hosts this month.
Even going into town which is about a 30 minute kumbi ride, we have to be in groups of 2s or 3s minimum. The highlight of my week was yesterday after church, Lauren and I left the large group to go to a restaurant called Ocean Basket for sushi. It was beautiful! Just the 2 of us having meaningful conversation. No one talking over us, making assumptions, no pretense.
We have 1 week left here of ministry and all-squad month. Please pray for me that I will continue to live out God’s peace that passes understanding, and at the end of this month produce patience, joy, long-suffering, and the other fruits of the Spirit.
I almost forgot to mention!!!! Last Monday, the squad surprised me and Eva (who shares my birthday) with a pizza party at a place in town. Mondays we do market ministry – we walk through the local markets and pray with people and talk with people about Jesus. Afterwards, my team leader Jacob, seemed to be in a hurry to meet up where he said Shawn was in another part of town. As we arrived, I noticed people from the squad there, in addition to Shawn, but I did not realize until the next thing I know everyone yells surprise and a tiara is being placed on my head. They managed to surprise me, and I had no idea!!!
The next day, the festivities continued. I loved the surprise pizza party, but the continued celebration was a bit overwhelming. Overall though, I’m excited to see how I continue to grow in this next year of my life. Following Jesus is quite the adventure.
As always, please go to www.Instagram.com/sharonruns for photos. I try to post every week, depending on WiFi.
In courageous faith and for His glory alone,
Sharon
