So….I have a confession. I thought I’d be home by now. I know this may surprise some of you, especially those of you that have so faithfully supported me. But let me explain.
In Honduras and Guatemala (Month 1 & 2), I kept having dreams about going home. I didn’t think much about them, except that it meant I was homesick. I brought it up to my squad leader who suggested I pray about it. I hadn’t really considered praying about the dreams, but I realized that I should. So that night, I prayed that God would let me know if those dreams meant anything, if they were to prepare me for what was to come.
That night, I dreamt I went home yet again.
In the dream, I was given a timeline of when I might go home (based on how far preggo my beautiful sister-in-law was in the dream), but I was not given a reason. When I woke up, I first wondered if the dream was prophetic. Then I was sad at the thought of not finishing the Race. That quickly turned to fear about the reason that would bring me home. I talked to my squad leaders again, who prayed over me and agreed to continue praying for me. I decided to put it in the back of my mind. I resolved not to let it affect how I acted for whatever time I had left.
But as the designated time (last week of May/first week of June) came closer and closer, I had a harder time putting it out of my mind. Anything that came up at home caught my attention, no matter how small. I questioned each thing and wondered, “Will this progress and be my reason for going home?” I was slightly fearful & anxious, but I knew God was in control no matter what happened. I began to even look forward to going home. I thought I’d make it for my nephew’s 6th birthday (his first birthday that I would miss since his birth). I thought that I’d be able to go to my brother’s wedding in August. I started to plan.
And then the last week of May passed. Then the first week of June passed, and then the second week of June.
I felt confused and disappointed.
I was so sure that dream was from God. I was so sure that I was going home. Honestly, I still don’t understand why I had that dream right after I prayed about it. Maybe God will let me see the reason for that later, maybe not. In the wake of this disappointment and confusion, I have been so incredibly homesick. I have wanted to go home so badly. But I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that God called me to come on the Race. So, no matter how I feel, I will be obedient to what He’s asked of me. I will probably be homesick until I land on American soil, but I will follow where God is leading.
But here’s the thing- I’m still about $3,400 short of my final deadline, which is due July 1st. So despite all my feelings (and let’s face it, I have a lot of those), I don’t want to go home. I know that because God called me here, He will provide. If you want to help keep me here, first: please pray! Secondly, if you feel led to give, you can do that by either clicking on the top or top left “Support Me” links OR by mailing checks to:
Adventures in Missions
PO BOX 742570
Atlanta, GA 30374-2570
*Just be sure to write my name on the memo line
**Also, it takes about 10 days to process checks
All donations are tax deductible. Also, all online donations do have a 3% transaction fee.
Thank you so much to all of you who have faithfully prayed and supported me! I love and miss each and everyone of you!
