Alright, good morning ya’ll. So, today I wanted to talk
about something that God’s been teaching me recently. So, Emily Peterson gave a
speech in El Salvador
talking about getting out of the boat and walking with Jesus on the water. She
talked about our need to die so that Jesus can live in us. She asked, “What is
that one thing of comfort that you’ve been holding on to that God is calling
you to let go of and just trust Him?” For me, I knew the answer: food.
It’s
funny that would be my greatest fear going on the race. It wasn’t getting
malaria. It wasn’t being robbed. My greatest fear coming on the race was that I
would drop from 162 lbs to 145 lbs. Skin and bones, that was my fear. Skin and
bones. I am afraid of becoming weak and losing the little bit of muscle I’ve
been able to gain over the past six years.
When I
came on the race I was expecting no other option but to live off the World Race
diet forced by our limited budget. However, I quickly came to discover that
there were plenty of opportunities to purchase my own food here and there.
So what
did I do? Man, I purchased my own personal stash of nutrition. With my own
peanut butter and honey sandwiches on wheat bread, my own whole grain
crackers and tuna, I wasn’t afraid anymore of
lacking the nutrition I would need. I could take care of myself.
But when
Emily Peterson asked that night what God might be calling us to give up, I knew
it was my stash, my little corner of security, the one little place I could go
to make sure my body had everything it needs. God was asking me to give it up
and just trust Him to provide for me each day with the nutrition I would need. He
was asking me to look to Him every day for provision in my meals.
This was
more than just a fear of malnutrition though. This was also a lack of
self-control. Since I have such a high metabolism, I hate throwing food away,
and I want to be sure my body gets all the nutrition it needs, I was taking it
upon myself to eat most of the food that people planned on throwing away. God
had to teach me that once I am full, it is more wasted on my body than in the
trash. In the trash it does no further damage, in my body it does.
So, I
gave it up. I gave my stash away. I said, “Lord, I am only going to eat what
you provide me with every day. I am not going to keep a pantry of my own.” I
gave my honey and peanut butter to Emily Carmichael and the rest of my food to
various other people. I saved a little bit for the trip and only over the last
couple of days have I gradually finished it off.
I’ve learned to be more self-disciplined with my
eating. I’m learning to say, “Enough,” more often. I’m realizing when I my body
has had enough carbs even though I am not full. And even if I’m still hungry,
I’ve learned to recognize when the food I’m eating is no longer healthy for me.
In short, God’s been teaching me to master my appetite, because it really
comes down to hunger. I hate being hungry. When I eat, I want to eat until
I am full. The only problem is that I have a huge appetite. So, I usually end
up eating more than I need. And at night, for some reason, is when I am the
weakest. Night is the time I am most likely to eat more than I need simply because
I enjoy eating. If there is food sitting around that looks tasty, and if nobody
else is claiming it, I usually take care of it.
But
honestly, the opportunity to exercise self-control is something I only have for
a little while. There will be no more hunger in heaven. I will no longer need
food. So, this is the one opportunity I have to build my character by
practicing self-discipline. Think about it, self-control is part of the fruit of
the Spirit in Galatians five. It’s included in 2 Peter chapter one as an
attribute to excel in for growing in Christ.
The
chance to exercise self-discipline and give up eating more food is an
opportunity to know Christ and be more like Him. Jesus is a man of
self-discipline. I want to know Him; therefore, I will learn to master my
appetite. So help me God. Amen.
